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Big Brother

Big Brother Celebrity Hijack Betting Odds: Calista To Win?

by Stuart Heritage

So far it’s painfully clear that the Big Brother Celebrity Hijack housemates are an absurdly irritating group of overconfident bastards, but that’s missing the real point of the show, isn’t it?

And the real point of Big Brother Celebrity Hijack is that celebrity hijackers can do naughty things to the housemates. Evil, huh? No, not once you’ve realised that even when playing Big Brother, most famous people are too scared of destroying their reputations to be genuinely nasty. In fact, the extent of the celebrities’ evilness has probably been Matt Lucas getting a fat boy to shout about cake, which is hardly going to put him on the CIA Most Wanted list, is it? We want real evil from the hijackers, and if that starts with Kelly Osbourne starving Liam to death then so be it.

Who’ll win Big Brother Celebrity Hijack? Here are the Big Brother Celebrity Hijack betting odds for Victor, Amy and Calista with help from Paddy Power…

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Big Brother Celebrity Hijack Betting Odds: Jade To Win?

by Stuart Heritage

Now that we’ve had a full weekend to absorb the various personalities of the new Big Brother Celebrity Hijack housemates, what have we learnt about this compelling anthropological study?

Well, in a nutshell, that they’re all turds. Self-centred arrogant turds the bloody lot of them. At least Big Brother Celebrity Hijack has managed to teach us something already – that if you’re young and prodigiously talented, there’s a pretty high likelihood that you’re going to be an utter bell-end of the very worst kind as well. And we’ve got a month of putting up with them yapping on about themselves like horrible miniature Donald Trumps as well. Joy. No really, we’re thrilled.

So who’s going to win Big Brother Celebrity Hijack anyway? Here’s the first part of our Big Brother Celebrity Hijack betting odds – for Jay, Liam and Jade – with help from Paddy Power…

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Big Brother Celebrity Hijack Betting Odds: Who Are These Fools?

by Stuart Heritage

Have you heard the news? Celebrity Big Brother’s back on the air, only this time Channel 4 is so scared of starting another full-scale international race war that it’s had to make some changes.

For starters you can’t call it Celebrity Big Brother any more – you have to call it Big Brother Celebrity Hijack. Second of all, it’s all on E4 rather than Channel 4 itself – which is frankly an outrage because if Big Brother’s on E4, where are the 15 solid daily hours of Friends repeats going to go? And thirdly there aren’t any celebrities in the Big Brother house – for the next month the celebrities are Big Brother and the Big Brother Celebrity Hijack housemates are ‘specially talented’ normal goons who seem to think that spending a month in a box being shouted at by Ian Wright will improve their lives somehow. Fools.

The housemates all entered the Big Brother house last night and one of the fuckers has got to win, so here are the early Big Brother Celebrity Hijack betting odds, with help from Paddy Power…

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