Alan Sugar, now affectionately known as Suralan – or, alternatively, a grimacing Wooly Willy toy with a haunted look in its eye stuck crudely onto a child’s wrinkled body in a mortician’s suit – sits in the high chair grumbling at moronic, vapid shills.
It almost sounds like the perfect job doesn’t it? Imagine being paid by the BBC to sit at a desk and break idiot’s hearts for the entertainment of the braying public. It’s one of the easiest jobs in the world.
However, the catch is, he has to continually meet these dunderheads without pulling out a carpet stapler and filling their faces full of excruciating tiny wounds.
