Last night The Hurt Locker swept the board at the BAFTAs, winning six awards. But screw all that.
Because we were there too. As is becoming gloriously traditional, hecklerspray was invited to cover the BAFTAs red carpet. And, as is becoming equally traditional, we were abysmal. While we may have seen the likes of James Cameron and Prince William and Robert Pattinson from a distance, our freakish proximity to George Lamb from BBC Three meant that most of these people sensibly kept as far away from us as possible.
What follows is a video diary of the night. It’s intended to be a first-hand account of A-list BAFTAs glamour. You, on the other hand, might see it as the painful unravelling of one man’s mind as he slowly realises that he’s desperately in love with George Lamb from Young Butcher Of The Year. Please enjoy, and promise not to judge us too harshly…
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If you believe that the BAFTAs act as a bellweather for the Oscars, then Slumdog Millionaire will win all the Oscars.
Also, the Oscars are going to be really bloody drizzly. Because that happened at the BAFTAs too. But anyway, Slumdog Millionaire was the big winner at last night’s BAFTA awards, scooping Best Film, Best Director, Best Music, Best Cinematography, Best Editing and Best Adapted Screenplay. Why? Because it’s principally British? No. Well, yes. A bit.
But Slumdog Millionaire wasn’t the only thing to leave the BAFTAs with anything. We left with the onset of trenchfoot. Eat that, Dev Patel.
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If you believe that the BAFTAs act as a bellweather for the Oscars, then Slumdog Millionaire will win all the Oscars.
Also, the Oscars are going to be really bloody drizzly. Because that happened at the BAFTAs too. But anyway, Slumdog Millionaire was the big winner at last night's BAFTA awards, scooping Best Film, Best Director, Best Music, Best Cinematography, Best Editing and Best Adapted Screenplay. Why? Because it's principally British? No. Well, yes. A bit.
But Slumdog Millionaire wasn't the only thing to leave the BAFTAs with anything. We left with the onset of trenchfoot. Eat that, Dev Patel.
Because none of you have anything better to do than spend your weekend afternoons staring at a computer and intermittently hitting the refresh button, may we remind you that hecklerspray will be live-blogging the BAFTAs red carpet from the BAFTAs red carpet on Sunday.
It should be fun. Alternatively it could be cold and miserable and full of bastards and utterly destroy our faith in humanity forever. In which case you’re going to hear all about it.
So be sure to come back here between 4:30 and 6:30 on Sunday for all the action.
Incidentally, thanks for all the question suggestions yesterday. You are all deeply disturbed and we shall be using as many of them as we can before we get arrested.
As we mentioned yesterday, we’re going to be Twittering the BAFTAs red carpet on Sunday, live from the BAFTAs red carpet direct to hecklerspray via phone.
And that means two things – firstly, you need to be here between 3pm and 6pm for a succession of 140-character updates on who’s wearing what, who’s given us the stink-eye and, most likely, how unbelievably cold we are.
And secondly, we want you to tell us what questions we should ask the stars. How much of a tit does Kate Winslet plan to make of herself this time? How many dog testicles can Mickey Rourke fit into his mouth at a time? That sort of thing. If they’re good enough – and we don’t completely brick it beforehand – we’ll ask as many of them as we can.
OK, now go crazy.
This Sunday the 2009 BAFTAs are taking place in London. And we’re going to be there. For you.
That’s right – unless something terrible happens in the interim, we’ll be spending Sunday afternoon pressed against a metal railing in the cold shouting at millionaires until they talk to us. And, thanks to the wonders of modern technology, you can be there too.
We’ll be Twittering the nuts off the BAFTAs red carpet experience as it happens, and you’ll be able to follow it live. Come here between 3pm and 6pm on Sunday afternoon for the liveblog, and throughout the day on Monday for reports and pictures and videos and whatever other nonsense we manage to get our hands on.
Will you join us? You’d be making an old, potentially terminally-frostbitten blogger very happy if you do.
With the Golden Globes cancelled and the Oscars and Grammys looking likely to go the same way, what are the biggest awards around?
That's right, the BAFTAs. And because the BAFTAs are British, it's only right that it should focus on British films. And because the only British film made in the last year was Atonement, it stands to reason that Atonement should get so many BAFTA nominations that we actually feel a little bit embarrassed for it.
Even though it's sodding Atonement, for sod's sake.
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Last night The Hurt Locker swept the board at the BAFTAs, winning six awards. But screw all that.
