Jim Carrey’s gurning ways don’t quite hold the same box office potential that they once did. The once elastomug has had to put the teeth aside in recent years.

Make no mistake, I Love You Phillip Morris is not a return of the Funster. Carrey plays Steven Russell, a policeman, Christian and a doting  husband to a more than perfect wife. It’s an idyllic lifestyle, one that has a couple of minor snags.

Mainly that Steven is a raving homosexual. It’s something that he doesn’t fully embrace until a car crash, giving him a new lease of life. His epiphany: breaking the law to support a super-luxurious lifestyle. You go girl!

While Steven has been building up an unhealthy portfolio of cons, it all catches up with him, leading to his unfortunate incarceration. In prison he meets Phillip Morris (Ewan McGregor), a gentle soul and the two fall in love through prison bars, beatings and bunk sharing.

It’s an offbeat comedy, not full of laugh-out-loud escapades, the gayness itself isn’t so much of a tool of ridicule, just an unconventional aspect of a messed-up love story. McGregor and Carrey actually have a surprising amount of chemistry, making for a tangible touchstone in an otherwise outlandish, unbelievable true story.

It’s a story that would probably amuse more in the trivia section of a lads rag but the directional duo of Glenn Ficarra and John Requa have downplayed most of the laughs in the film. It doesn’t quite fit in with Carrey’s style but gives it an edge, a darkness that imbued the debut director’s previous screenplay for Bad Santa.

It’s not that the story doesn’t have potential; most of the scenarios could be adapted into features of their own. It’s all ripe for comedy but it only amuses, making most of the impact by the notion of this being some bizarre non-fiction.

Underplaying to the extreme, it often feels unsure of what it wants to be. Is it an unconventional love story; an outlandish comedy-con caper; or another crowd-pleasing Carrey comedy vehicle? Russell’s time in prison is the only area where the balance manages to maintain, especially in one sequence of slow-dancing, flippant expletives and prison beating.

There’s much to like, though, quick, breezy, never resting on one con or situation for too long and by the end of the film you’re left spurring the central coupling on to happiness. Perhaps in a heavier hand this could have been a zany outlet for Carrey’s old charms or another director could have steered this into more subtle territory. As it is, a slightly uneven, unconventional tale that has enough twists to make this engaging.

‘Spray Rating: 3.5/5

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The king of punching above his weight has attempted to strike another blow for weird-looking men everywhere.

Yes, Billy-Bob Thornton has made claims that Angelina Jolie may come crawling back to him at some point, once she’s done with her relationship with that Brad Pitt character. We’re not sure when that will be, mind, as she has just about to have some of those child things, with Pitt serving up half of the chromosomes in the deal.

But hey – he’s already had a crack at her, so why shouldn’t ol’ Billy-Bob be confident?

See, Thornton has a theory on Jolie’s relationship with the pretty-boy Pitt. And in fine Hollywood fashion he’s decided that it’s something we all need to know about, rather than something that should probably stay firmly locked up in his head lest it sound like the insane rantings of a jealous old man.

Talking at a press conference for his new album, Billy, Bobby, whatever he’s called said:

“She’s just going through a high school phase. You know dating the quarterback of the football team with Brad Pitt over there. She’ll be waking up from that dream in no time.”

Bibbly, Bobbly – you struck so, so fucking lucky getting her in the first place, there’s no need to be a ridiculous prat about things and make such audacious claims. Maybe hecklerspray can let you off for making your thoughts public like this, but at least leave it at that. No more silly claims, no more petty side swipes. You had your chance – everybody gets one.

Oh no:

“Who knows if I’ll be there when she’s ready to come to her senses though.”

So not only is Bad Santa himself claiming that Angelina Jolie is going through a phase by having a long-term relationship with the soon-to-be father of her children, he’s also saying that if (or when, in Thornton’s mind) the two split up he might not even take her back.

The man must be on some good shit if his mind-drum plays along to that beat.

We do have some suggestions for Bibble Bobble though, which may help him in his quest to get Jolie back, or turn her down, or whatever he wants to do, if she does break up with Bradley and come crawling back to him:

1) If he still has the vial of her blood lying around, Thornton could always dabble in a bit of Angelina-cloning. This would give him an identical copy of Jolie, with the added bonus of her being a clean slate, ready for him to tell: “you fancy older, weird-looking blokes called Billy-Bob. And not attractive A-list movie stars.”

2) Thornton could put himself up for adoption, in the hope that Jolie’s soon-to-be born children haven’t dampened her taste for adoption pie. She unsuspectingly brings him into the Jolie/Pitt family fold, Bibbles works from there. We’re not coming up with all of the plan, just helping him on his way.

3) Billy-Bob could approach Angelina from a purely friendly perspective and become something of a confidant. During the process of heart-to-heart, deep discussions, Thornton could then convince Jolie she should return to her days of lesbianism (or at least bisexuality). Then it’s a simple case of a sex-change and Bob’s your… lover?

4) Get Angelina so smacked off her tits she starts talking utter shite, passes out and when she wakes up she’s in the middle of nowhere, alone with Billob. Granted, this is technically kidnapping, but it’s no more insane than claiming you wouldn’t take Angeline Jolie up on the offer of getting back together with her.

We’ve run out of suggestions now. But just remember who’s trying to help you, Billy-Bob Thornton. We’re your friends.