Well folks, I hope you’re all ready for the romance of the decade! And no, I’m not referring to this decade. This is a relationship that is straight out of 2003, so much so that I’m not actually sure why I’m blogging about it. But, here I am, writing a blog about the blossoming love between Avril Lavigne and Ryan Cabrera.
And no, this isn’t another post where I try to make another fake couple happen, because I really wouldn’t have gone this irrelevant with it. Even I have standards (but clearly not since I’m writing about this).
The Avril Lavigne Nudes You’ve Been Looking For (41 PICS)
It seems as if everyone wants to see Avril Lavigne nudes. Paparazzi have been stalking Ms Lavigne for the longest time, trying to catch a nip-slip or crotch reveal… the result of an untimely wardrobe malfunction. Or maybe a boob slipping out from under a pink bikini on a yacht. Well, the wait is over folks… here are the Avril Lavigne nudes you’ve been waiting for.
Canadian singer Avril Lavigne is a cutie and she’s been the favorite of many boys (and girls) for a long time. Gradually abandoning her early pop-punk princess image, she’s evolved into the beautiful blonde that she was meant to be. She’s talented, sexy and gorgeous. Everyone loves her. Even haters like to look at her.
Avril Lavigne & Chad Kroeger Done Being Lamest Couple
Don’t let the title of this blog fool you, Avril Lavigne and Chad Kroeger certainly haven’t gotten any less lame, they’re still super fucking awful and lame, however, they may not be a couple for much longer. (Sadly) Canada’s most famous music couple (so ashamed to be Canadian right now) are, according to numerous sources, allegedly heading for divorce.
Avril Lavigne is barely 30 and she’s already set to be a two-time divorcee (she was previously married to Deryk Whibley of Sum 41. Another mediocre Canadian rockstar. She clearly has a type.) The two only got married in July 2013, so I guess it didn’t take too long for two of the most annoying celebrities in the world to start annoying each other.
Avril Lavigne Is The Definition Of Awkward
Let me just put this out there.? Avril Lavigne sucks.?? Her music sucks.? Her clothing sucks.? Her husband SUCKS.? And in case Avril needed another element of suck to round out her total encompassing of all things sucktastic,? here comes a meet and greet with some fans that is just beyond terrible.
And I know what you’re thinking.? “Fans?? What fans?”? We would be wrong it seems.? I didn’t even realize that anyone who still calls themselves a Lavigne fan?doesn’t also have a mental condition causing them to still think we are in 2002.?? Color me shocked.
Avril Lavigne’s Wedding Was Every 13-Year Old Emo Kid’s Dream
Remember that phase you went through sometime in middle school? The one where you shopped exclusively in the ‘punk’ section of Claire’s Accessories and thought you were so?rebellious for wearing copious amounts of eyeliner and Converse All Stars? It looks like Avril Lavigne never grew out of hers.?
Do people still use the word ’emo’? Well if they do, Avril’s Canada Day wedding to Chad Kroeger, the formerly floppy haired Nickelback singer, fall firmly underneath that umbrella. of course, the official theme was ‘romantic goth’ , but no goth worth their salt would be caught dead with straggly hair extensions and poorly applied eyeliner.
Avril Lavigne Now Almost Entirely Pointless Now That She’s Single
Befanged, alt.lifestyle tourist, Avril Lavigne, long ago decided that being a skatergirl wasn’t for her because acne, greasy hair and ill-fitting jeans wasn’t at all attractive. And so, she promptly went mental, spat at some photographers and became airbrushed.
Losing her raison d’?tre, she tottered off into some pop-twilight, only getting column inches for her clearly tedious private life.
Things livened up briefly when she got into a bar-room brawl with some women, which left her bozo hunk of a fella – Brody Jenner (how is that not a girl’s name?) – with a bit gash on his face. No, we’re not talking about him fellating Lavigne. Alas, now, she’s got nothing as the pair have decided to wave ta-ta to their relationship.
Readers’ Letters – 06/01/12 – “You Didn't Even Have The Guts To Put Your Name On This. No Balls???”
Happy New Year, you jerk-offs. A lot of you have been snivelling onto us, trying to get us to bring back Readers’ Letters so that you don’t have to trawl through our articles looking for all the nut jobs that believe we’re being serious (which we are, obviously) and to you we say only this.
FINE, JEEZ.
You’re so needy. Look at you, sitting there like overgrown babies desperately waiting to read about all the people that hate us so that you can make a mental note of the kind of thing to bombard us with over the next week.
You’re the worst kind of scum and that’s why we love you. Anyway, for the first time in 2012, let’s take a dive into our putrid postbag shall we?
Fan Rightly Attacks Avril Lavigne OnStage For Attempting Coldplay Cover [VIDEO]
For a while, Avril Lavigne was one of the most famous people on Earth. She was a very marketable mix of Alanis Morrisette and Nu Metal and everyone wanted her to hurry up with the ageing process so they could stop feeling guilty for fancying her.
And her fangs.
Like Hubba Bubba, she quickly lost her flavour, spat at some photographers and started wearing dolly bird make-up… yet somehow, she still has something of a career. So while she toured herself to her dwindling audience, she figured she’d throw a cover version into her set. A Coldplay song no less. This is where one brave soul rushed the stage to try and stop this unfurling horror.
Avril Lavigne Files For Divorce From Whoever Her Husband Was
If your dream was to one day see a Sum 41/ Avril Lavigne supergroup, we’ve got some miserable news for you.
You have crap dreams. Seriously, try and upgrade your ambition a little. Oh, and the other piece of miserable news is that the aforementioned supergroup will never come to pass – following their recent split announcement, Avril Lavigne and Deryck Whibley have filed for divorce.
Apparently Avril Lavigne cited irreconcilable differences in her divorce papers, but that’s just legal talk. We think it means that they had to get divorced because literally nobody on the planet had thought about either of them once in the last two years.
Avril Lavigne & Deryck Whibley Split: Remember Either Of Them?
Are you invested in the lives of people who you once sort of half-liked but now no longer remember at all?
You are? Then you might want to sit down. Remember Avril Lavigne and Deryck Whibley? Come on, yes you do. They were the king and queen of bad, faux-rebellious teenage music from several years ago. Avril Lavigne and Deryck Whibley. You remember. She was definitely a punk because sometimes she wore a tie in an ironic way and his name was both stupid and hard to spell. You remember Avril Lavigne and Deryck Whibley. You do.
Anyway, they’ve split up.