When you’re looking into an advert you have to look beyond the obvious and into the depths of what makes advertising people and companies decide that things are a permissible idea. Take as an example, the ill-fated attempt by Sabatier knives to reinvigorate their brand by getting in Danny Dyer as a spokesperson. Things often don’t go the way you want them to.
Cue Bernard Matthews Farms and their £3 million (let that sink in for a moment)attempt to rehabilitate serial granny-botherer Marco Pierre-White from disturbing waxwork version of Michael Hutchence back to celebrity chef in one fell swoop.
What better way to achieve it than to pair him with celebrity nice-guy and all-round former Eastender Martin Kemp?
You’re like most blokes, aren’t you? Yeah, you. Even if you’re a girl, you’re like most blokes right? Of course you are. Most blokes are into things that blokes are into. Thing for blokes by blokes like fast cars, pornography and DIY. If you’re not like most blokes then you’re probably one of them gays that likes watching Glee and talking about your feelings.
Yeah: a girl.
At least, that’s what advertisers want you to believe because, unless you fit into a one tangible group that they assign through tireless research and watching old episodes of Top Gear; men like some things, women like others, children like toys and teenagers like being mocked for having poor skin.
At the moment the whole universe seems to have been affected by a few people in the banking world.
Subsequently some people are out of jobs, interest rates get cut and everyone ends up paying over the odds for everything.
So what would be the worst thing to possibly to do in a situation like this? Going bust is one thing but re-branding your company comes somewhere close. At a cost of redesigning logos and notifying customers, it all adds up. You’ll need to tell the humble public of the decision. You know, so people know who they’re actually insured with.
Norwich Union is now called Aviva for no particular reason and, instead of hiring out thirty seconds of TV advertising time to tell us this with a cost effective still, they had to go all glitzy and clever on us. Ringo Star, Alice Cooper, Dame Edna and Bruce Willis have all been drafted in to tell us that their careers would have gone tits up if they hadn’t changed from their original dull names.
Do we care? Not really, it’s more interesting to know how much Bruce Willis got paid to promote something he’s never heard of. In the case of Ringo Star, it wouldn’t have mattered if he had been christened Megatron 2000 With New Grilling Facilities. He’s always going to be known as the annoying twat out of The Beatles.
When you’re looking into an advert you have to look beyond the obvious and into the depths of what makes advertising people and companies decide that things are a permissible idea. Take as an example, the ill-fated attempt by Sabatier knives to reinvigorate their brand by getting in Danny Dyer as a spokesperson. Things often don’t go the way you want them to.
