HecklerSpray

Grown Up Gossip & Internet Villainy

Aerosmith Split: Steven Tyler Hangs Up On His Wrinkly Friends

November 10th, 2009 By Stuart Heritage

Aerosmith, Aerosmith split, Steven Tyler, Joe PerryThis Aerosmith split is ugly, and not just because everyone involved in it looks like a voodoo doll made from medical waste.

No, it’s the bitterness that’s ugly. Steven Tyler has only been out of Aerosmith for a few days, and the rest of the band are already lining up to badmouth him as much as possible. Just yesterday Joe Perry complained to a radio station that Steven Tyler had recently hung up on him midway through a phonecall.

And that’s just the start. We also heard that Steven Tyler always steals the Coco Pops whenever the band buys a Kellogg’s Variety Pack, thinks that Joe Perry’s mum is a slag and once drew a cock and balls on the back of Brad Whitford‘s bomber jacket in Tipp-Ex. The man is evil.

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Steven Tyler Leaves Aerosmith, But It’s Not All Good News

November 9th, 2009 By Stuart Heritage

Aerosmith, Steven Tyler, Aerosmith SplitIt’s weird when old people get divorced, isn’t it? You’re both going to be dead soon, so what’s the point?

Which brings us to Aerosmith. Despite having a combined age of the highest number you can possibly think of, Aerosmith have just decided to split up. Actually, no, that isn’t strictly true – Steven Tyler has decided to leave Aerosmith to concentrate on something called ‘Brand Tyler’, something that – if Steven Tyler’s appearance in the movie Be Cool is anything to go by – will be the very worst thing ever created by a human being in all of history.

As for Aerosmith? They might carry on without him. Idiots.

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