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Badvertising: The Flintstones Have A Smoke
This isn’t so much of a bad advert as a “what the hell were they thinking?” advert. As most people will know, The Flintstones was a programme for children, set in the time of the Stone Age. Because animators were lazy at the time, the same plotlines happened in The Jetsons, which was based in the future. With the average age of a child watching The Flintstones about ten and under, you’d have thought Barney and Fred would be flogging sweets, army propaganda or toys. In a very odd twist, they are in fact puffing away on a Winston cigarette. Something that any sane parent wouldn’t give to their ickle child.
This isn’t so much of a bad advert as a “what the hell were they thinking?” advert. As most people will know, The Flintstones was a programme for children, set in the time of the Stone Age. Because animators were lazy at the time, the same plotlines happened in The Jetsons, which was based in the future. With the average age of a child watching The Flintstones about ten and under, you’d have thought Barney and Fred would be flogging sweets, army propaganda or toys. In a very odd twist, they are in fact puffing away on a Winston cigarette. Something that any sane parent wouldn’t give to their ickle child.
Kerry Katona Porn Is A Tragic Possibility
There are millions of disgusting things that make us want to vomit into our bowler hats. For example, scraping dog poo off a shoe after accidentally stepping in a big steaming pile usually makes lunch's burrito want to reappear. Other unpleasant spectacles that we’d rather forget involve watching Kerry Katona giving birth on MTV, Kerry Katona getting her boobs inflated to a bigger size on MTV and hearing Kerry Katona in general on MTV. Now there’s a distinct chance there’s some non-arousing Kerry Katona porn doing the rounds. Probably not on MTV.
There are millions of disgusting things that make us want to vomit into our bowler hats. For example, scraping dog poo off a shoe after accidentally stepping in a big steaming pile usually makes lunch's burrito want to reappear. Other unpleasant spectacles that we’d rather forget involve watching Kerry Katona giving birth on MTV, Kerry Katona getting her boobs inflated to a bigger size on MTV and hearing Kerry Katona in general on MTV. Now there’s a distinct chance there’s some non-arousing Kerry Katona porn doing the rounds. Probably not on MTV.
Disney Sued By God-Fearing Young Sikh
Normally, Disney World is a magical place where pixies float through the air on fluffy pink tufts of cotton candy, fairies bless each child with things like good fortune and longevity, and hat-wearing man-dogs do stuff too. Sometimes though, the place is just a target for lawsuits that state it has religious undertones that persecute Muslims because of their head dress & facial scruff - and that's just the women! Disney of course denies all this - but it hasn't stopped one young man from suing them on this very premise. He tried to get a job with them - and was denied because of his turban and facial hair. Apparently, he didn't apply for anything in the Aladdin department.
Normally, Disney World is a magical place where pixies float through the air on fluffy pink tufts of cotton candy, fairies bless each child with things like good fortune and longevity, and hat-wearing man-dogs do stuff too. Sometimes though, the place is just a target for lawsuits that state it has religious undertones that persecute Muslims because of their head dress & facial scruff - and that's just the women! Disney of course denies all this - but it hasn't stopped one young man from suing them on this very premise. He tried to get a job with them - and was denied because of his turban and facial hair. Apparently, he didn't apply for anything in the Aladdin department.
Papoose Apparently Tries To Bust Remy Ma Out Of Prison
How many rap superstars have gone to prison in the past few years? 100? 200? Well we don’t have an exact count, but we heard that in Atlanta they make up more than half of the incarcerated population. Further rumor has it that while in there they all join together making beautiful music banging tin coffee cups on their cell bars and slapping out dope beats by smacking soap-on-a-rope into the bare bottoms of their cell mates. It's all melody they tell us. And on the chain gang they sing into their pickaxes. It’s just what we heard. Whatever stories you’ve heard about rappers in prison before – forget them. They pale in comparison to this one. That’s because this one involves Remy Ma getting smuggled a possible means of escape by her rhyme-loving groom.
How many rap superstars have gone to prison in the past few years? 100? 200? Well we don’t have an exact count, but we heard that in Atlanta they make up more than half of the incarcerated population. Further rumor has it that while in there they all join together making beautiful music banging tin coffee cups on their cell bars and slapping out dope beats by smacking soap-on-a-rope into the bare bottoms of their cell mates. It's all melody they tell us. And on the chain gang they sing into their pickaxes. It’s just what we heard. Whatever stories you’ve heard about rappers in prison before – forget them. They pale in comparison to this one. That’s because this one involves Remy Ma getting smuggled a possible means of escape by her rhyme-loving groom.
The X-Files: I Want To Believe – Rubbishy New Movie Title
There you have it, folks - the title of the new X-Files movie is The X-Files: I Want To Believe, possibly short for The X-Files: I Want To Believe That You'll Watch My Stupid Movie. No, we're just kidding. But only about the last bit. The movie really is going to be called The X-Files: I Want To Believe. It was made official by the studio on Wednesday and now we're all stuck with it. Worst of all, though, The X-Files: I Want To Believe doesn't even offer the slightest clue about what the story is about. It's hardly Zack And Miri Make A Porno in terms of descriptive merit, is it? We've seen the trailer, so let's just hope that Chris Carter sees sense, takes our advice and calls it The X-Files: Look! It's Billy Connolly Running Around In The Snow Looking A Bit Worried! Gosh!
There you have it, folks - the title of the new X-Files movie is The X-Files: I Want To Believe, possibly short for The X-Files: I Want To Believe That You'll Watch My Stupid Movie. No, we're just kidding. But only about the last bit. The movie really is going to be called The X-Files: I Want To Believe. It was made official by the studio on Wednesday and now we're all stuck with it. Worst of all, though, The X-Files: I Want To Believe doesn't even offer the slightest clue about what the story is about. It's hardly Zack And Miri Make A Porno in terms of descriptive merit, is it? We've seen the trailer, so let's just hope that Chris Carter sees sense, takes our advice and calls it The X-Files: Look! It's Billy Connolly Running Around In The Snow Looking A Bit Worried! Gosh!
George Clooney! Crazy Voicemail! Police!
All we had to do was pull the string that was attached to our paper-cup earpiece and it lead us straight to Zac Efron’s mom. She was in our living room, even though clearly nobody would have let her in – after all she is a literal cow. It happened just like in Beastmaster, witches and all. Well that is certainly what it says on Zac’s Wikipedia page anyway – third paragraph down.
As we stood there watching Zac Efron’s cow mom scurry back to the field from whence she came, we couldn’t help but wonder how a major star, like say George Clooney, might handle an uncalled-for crank like that.
And the answer there is police involvement.
Last time hecklerspray got a crank call, it was an easy solve.
All we had to do was pull the string that was attached to our paper-cup earpiece and it lead us straight to Zac Efron’s mom. She was in our living room, even though clearly nobody would have let her in – after all she is a literal cow. It happened just like in Beastmaster, witches and all. Well that is certainly what it says on Zac’s Wikipedia page anyway – third paragraph down.
As we stood there watching Zac Efron’s cow mom scurry back to the field from whence she came, we couldn’t help but wonder how a major star, like say George Clooney, might handle an uncalled-for crank like that.
And the answer there is police involvement.
