The internet is full of dicks (hecklerspray excluded, of course). Just take a look around: there’s that kid over there, blogging about his pathetic existence; that tweeting celebrity, moaning about their insufferable riches; and what about Justin Bieber? Ergh.
The internet is a horrible cesspit of words and pictures, never more aptly demonstrated than in social hub Facebook.
It’s also appropriate then that the story behind the invention of the 21st Century’s most dominating stalker tool, The Social Network, is as full of nauseating idiots as its millions of inhabitants.
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Like many people, we spend half our bloody lives on Facebook being all like “Oho, look, Ian’s updated his status to ‘Ian doesn’t understand’! Gosh!”
But that doesn’t mean that we want to see a Facebook movie ever. Ever ever ever ever ever. Which is a pain in the bum because Aaron Sorkin, the brain behind The West Wing and Studio 60 On The Sunset Strip, is only going to jolly well write one, isn’t he?
Not to be outdone, MySpace has also decided to make a movie – except that’ll be made by Uwe Boll off his chops on cattle tranquiliser, trapped in a kaleidoscope factory and given a budget of 50p and a cast of nearly-naked women whose dialogue only consists of the line “HEY! Want to get LAID Tonite?” repeated every three seconds until blood starts to trickle out of your face.
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