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3d

Pippa Middleton Offered A Princely $5million To Star In Porn Flick

by Mof Gimmers

The three big successes of the Royal Wedding between Prince William and Kate Middleton was the Austin Martin cameo at the close of proceedings… the other two? Notably, Pippa Middleton’s two arse cheeks. Pippa has gone from being the sister of the star attraction to being something of an overnight sensation, with people only ever [...]

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Hecklerspray Royal Wedding Liveblog! Off With Our Heads!

by Mof Gimmers

CLICK OVER THE JUMP  TO READ OUR LIVEBLOG AND KEEP PRESSING REFRESH OKAY? PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON WILL HAVE YOU IN THE TOWER, WHERE CROWS WILL PICK AT YOUR EYES IF YOU DON’T.

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Hail The Lizard Men! Hecklerspray Reminder About Royal Wedding Thing!

by admin

You didn’t forget did you? There’s a Royal Wedding on tomorrow and our editor Mof Gimmers and staunch Scot Michael Park will be liveblogging events with Super Kris manning the twitter account. We’re as sick of it as you are, but hopefully, we’ll be funny/nasty/libellous/overcome with emotion at it all. So join us or we’ll [...]

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Attention! Hecklerspray Is Liveblogging The Royal Wedding!

by Mof Gimmers

Join Mof Gimmers and Michael Park for a marvellous liveblog covering the Royal Wedding! That’s the one involving Prince William and Kate Middleton! There’ll be talk of dresses, dignitaries, alcoholism, self harm, people blowing trumpets and scurrilous, unsubstantiated rumours about the parentage of Prince Harry! Friday morning is when it all kicks off. Be sure [...]

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Please, Please Let The Marriage Of Dolly Parton And Prince Harry Happen

by Mof Gimmers

Dolly Parton, despite being 93% man-made (like a Rustler’s microwaveable burger), is still one of the most brilliant humans on the planet. She’s only got 3 or 4 really famous tunes, but that doesn’t matter – the world is better simply by her existence. Of course, like all country singers, Dolly has been unlucky in [...]

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Emma Watson Feels Sorry For Attractive, Wealthy Kate Middleton

by Mof Gimmers

Star of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows and owner of new enviable haircut, Emma Watson, is all heart. She really is. When it comes to feeling sorry for people, she’s the best in the business. And which needy urchin has bipped on her sympathy radar? Why, it is none other than our future Queen, [...]

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Prince William And Kate Middleton Are Amazing Because They’re Waterproof

by Mof Gimmers

Have you heard? Prince William and Kate Middleton are getting married! Of course you’ve heard – every two-bit schmuck with a laptop is writing about this gasping non-event (including us! Hurray!) Because the Royal Family lead secret lives, hidden behind great iron gates, gigantic grassy estates and flanked by men in red jackets and haircuts [...]

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Prince William And Kate Middleton To Live With Prince Harry Like Some Dreadful Sitcom

by Mof Gimmers

Have you seen that scene in Rain Man when Dustin Hoffman is sat on the bed making sex noises while Tom Cruise has it away with someone? That’s exactly what’s going to happen when Prince William and Kate Middleton get back off their honeymoon. Why? Well, despite being incredibly wealthy and part of a family [...]

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JLS To Release A Pointless 3D Film

by Matthew Laidlow

JLS have shown that you don’t have to be winners in order to achieve your dream of singing second rate R&B songs whilst posing with overpriced cars and women who are out of their league. JLS are, in fairness to them, weirdly popular despite having one of the worst band names in history – they [...]

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Prince William And Kate Middleton Reveal Wedding Music Choices! Listen To Them Here!

by Mof Gimmers

Oooh! The Royal Wedding! Brilliant! Loads of people pretend to be patriotic and the rest ham up how much they hate the Royals on their day off, specifically to celebrate the occasion. Stupid British people. And of course, because we really, really care about Prince William’s slightly balding pate and what dress Kate Middleton will [...]

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