2008 - HecklerSpray

MySpace Trawl ? Stuff We Liked From 2008

August 5th, 2012 By Matthew Laidlow

Before we delve head-on in to 2009 and bring you such weird and wonderful sounds as Mexican two-step, we thought we?d chew over some of the artists we covered in 2008.

You know, so they don't get all dusty in our archives.

This feature tries to bring a mix of completely brand new and unheard acts alongside those who need a bit of a push to get your attention. If we wanted to harp on about someone who’s released 50 CDRs and played one gig in Crewe, we?d write for some trendy sort of fanzine with a readership of twelve. Try to contain your excitement as we give our top ten list of last year.

Internet Users Still Morbidly Interested In Britney Spears

March 24th, 2009 By Stuart Heritage

What a week for Britney Spears – a new album, an X Factor appearance and an uncomfortably sobby documentary.

And now this. For what appears to be the billionth year on the trot, Britney Spears has been named as the most popular Yahoo search term of the year. Well, technically it was a combination of the search terms ‘Is Britney Spears dead yet?’, ‘Has Britney Spears died?’ ‘Seriously, is Britney Spears dead or not?’ and ‘Britney Speerz is funy LOL’ but none of those scan as well.

What’s most impressive is that Britney Spears managed to beat Barack Obama to the number one spot, which has to smart given his accomplishments this year. But it’s totally his fault – Obama had plenty of chances to put on a pink wig, wander aimlessly through a car park and babble in a British accent in the grip of a full-blown psychiatric meltdown, but instead he chose to become president-elect of America, the big idiot.

Big Brother Betting Odds – Newly Baldy Mikey to Win?

March 25th, 2009 By hecklerspray staff

So after last week’s yawn fest, when Dale and Stuart fought out the most boring eviction ever, let’s hope some spice returns to the Big Brother house.

It was a bold move by Big Brother yesterday, who asked for the housemates to fill a jar with hair. And it was an even bolder Mikey who decided that he would go skinhead to get the task motoring.

Darnell joined him and now, here we are, with two rather strange-looking slapheads in the house, waiting for the nominations today.

We now have ten housemates left. So let’s take a look at who’s in the running for the title in 2008, with betting odds, as ever, provided by Paddy Power.

It’s Mercury Prize Time Again!

March 25th, 2009 By Matthew Laidlow

Hooray! The Mercury Prize is waking from its sleepy hibernation to once again throw up a selection of albums to confuse everyone with.

Typically, there are a few nominees that everyone thinks will win because they’re popular and, of course, there are the albums that no-one has ever heard of before.

But this also means you can boost your own street cred and boast to people “Yeah, I had that album wayyyyyyy before it was swallowed up by the mass music-buying masses.”

The Spraylist 2007: Wishes For 2008

August 7th, 2012 By Stuart Heritage

Now we're at the bum-end of 2007, it's time to reflect on the year gone by.

It's a year that's seen hecklerspray writers thrown out of magazine-based writing competitions for cheating, hecklerspray writers painted bright orange as a gruesome initiation to other magazines, hecklerspray writers going on serious news programmes to discuss the real threat of wanking Kenyan monkeys and hecklerspray writers waggling huge black dildos around while being scathing about Second Life for digital TV channels. And we're even told that some things happened over the course of 2007 that didn't directly involve people who work for hecklerspray, although we are yet to see proof of this.

But what about next year? What do our senior writers personally want from that? Let's take a look…

No, Really: Jackson Five To Tour Next Year, Honest

March 31st, 2009 By Stuart Heritage

For years the world has thought that a Jackson Five reunion would be impossible, not least because nobody can imagine going to watch a gang of rickety old child-stars limping through Rockin' Robin fronted by a frail alabaster ghoul.

However, the world clearly doesn't have the self-belief of Jermaine Jackson, because he's decided that this exact tactic is what will make him successful again. According to Jermaine Jackson, the Jackson Five will reform and play some shows next year, with Michael Jackson firmly in place as a member of the group. But, accounting for Michael Jackson's notorious flakiness, Jermaine Jackson has drafted in a few Jackson Five understudies as a contingency should Michael Jackson pull out. And who wouldn't want to see a reunited Jackson Five with Samuel L Jackson, Randy Jackson or noted long-dead American organic chemist Charles Loring Jackson singing all of Michael's parts?