Strictly Come Dancing is just a few weeks from being over, so let’s celebrate that with some Strictly Come Dancing recaps.
As well as chucking out Jodie Kidd, Saturday’s Strictly Come Dancing also marked the last dance by John Sergeant after his controversial resignation last week. And, if anything, it only strengthened our crush on his dance partner Kristina Rihanoff. After all, who doesn’t love a girl who can’t even go three poxy seconds without breaking down in tears like some sort of monstrous goon? Sexy.
So here’s the Strictly Come Dancing recap for Christine Bleakley…
Christine Bleakley – Not a good Strictly Come Dancing for Christine Bleakley on Saturday. Her Cha Cha Cha to I Like It Like That got the lowest score of the night and was lambasted by the Strictly Come Dancing judges, who called it “disappointing, very wooden, sticky. You need to turn your feet out more. On a brighter note, some wonderful finishes that saved a little of it,” even though Christine did totally the right thing and dressed up like a filthy French whore for the dance because Rachel Stevens did the same thing a week before and got a massive score. In a way, though, we can see why Christine Bleakley got such a low score. Not because her routine was so stilted and and almost pantomime in its overt sexuality that at times she looked like a post-op transsexual on her first day as an end of their pier magician’s assistant in Blackpool, but because to train for the dance Christine Bleakley visited a primary school and one of the children actually told her “You should shoot for the stars and go for the glory.” We believe that Christine Bleakley’s Strictly Come Dancing score was docked because she didn’t instantly kick the kid in the face which, as we all know, is the only way to treat smarmy stageschool brats. Remember that for next week, Christine. Kick them in the face. Strictly Come Dancing Score – 27
Tomorrow: the Strictly Come Dancing recap for Tom Chambers.
