Tomorrow we get to see the next episode of Strictly Come Dancing. And it’s a good one, too – because tomorrow night is laydeeeez nite! Carol Smillie, Mica Paris and some anonymous woman from Casualty in sparkly dresses? Bring it on!
But that’s all you’re going to hear about the Strictly Come Dancing females until next week, because we’ve still got to look at the remaining Strictly Come Dancing men. Yesterday we decided that Jimmy Tarbuck and Matt Dawson probably weren’t going to win Strictly Come Dancing, but that’s only because the three contestants we’ll be looking at today can strut and prowl on the dancefloor like John Travolta trying to rollerskate across an icerink drunk. At night.
Here are the Strictly Come Dancing betting odds for DJ Spoony, Mark Ramprakash and Ray Fearon, with betting odds from PaddyPower…
DJ Spoony – As a former member of Radio One UK garage forebearers The Dreem Team, the only songs that DJ Spoony has ever heard are Fill Me In by Craig David and probably something by Oxide And Neutrino. This did not bode well for him ahead of his first Strictly Come Dancing routine, especially as he decided to dance to Kiss by Prince. Tom Jones covered Kiss. Tom Jones did not cover, say, Bandelero Desperado by MJ Cole, so we were worried for Spoony. However, a Strictly Come Dancing judge told him that “You’re fearless, and you have to be fearless to dance. I think you’ve got something.” Even though we thought that you needed to be fond of sequins and frilly blouses to dance, not fearless, things are looking up for DJ Spoony. SCORE: 27 – Strictly Come Dancing betting odds – 8/1
Mark Ramprakash – Cricketers are not normally known for their dancing prowess. Usually cricketers are better at staggering around like a drunken twat like Freddie Flintoff or somehow managing to make wheat sound even duller than it actually is in adverts like Ian Botham. All that changed when Darren Gough won Strictly Come Dancing last year and, so help us God, it continued on Saturday when Mark Ramprakash resolutely failed to suck at dancing the cha cha cha to Let’s Get Loud. Even worse, the horrifying scouse witch Strictly Come Dancing judge even found him – gulp – sexy, saying “Mark: my eyes were glued to your face and then they dropped down to your hips and you were moving them!” All together – yeeeeeeeurrch! SCORE: 27 – Strictly Come Dancing betting odds – 4/1
Ray Fearon – Is Ray Fearon good at dancing? Is Coke Zero slightly disappointing? Of course Ray Fearon is good at dancing – he seems to spend the majority of his life dressed in skintight t-shirts. If that isn’t a sure sign that a man can step out on the dancefloor with supreme confidence, we’re not sure what is. Sure enough, Ray Fearon’s routine made the female Strictly Come Dancing judge froth and screech like she’s overdosed on HRT: “I was feeling it – my eyes were glued to your cheeky hip action! Boy oh boy – a great performance.” Thank god that this Saturday’s Strictly Come Dancing is female-only, at least that way Arlene won’t burn through so many pairs of knickers, if only for a week. SCORE: 27 – Strictly Come Dancing betting odds – 4/1
Next week – it’s X Factor and Strictly Come Dancing betting odds a-go-go! Don’t forget to check out Paddypower.com for the full list of Strictly Come Dancing betting odds, either!
[story by Stuart Heritage]