Now that the Strictly Come Dancing wheat has been sorted from the Strictly Come Dancing chaff – and we're certain that this isn't the first time that Claire King has been called chaff – the last few weeks of Strictly Come Dancing are going to be tight.

Well, the last few weeks of Strictly Come Dancing will be tight in theory at least. But a lot of things are true in theory. In 'theory' bumblebees can't fly and in 'theory' you shouldn't be able to ram an entire stick of spaghetti down your pee-hole. But reality often gets in the way of theories, and this is as true for Strictly Come Dancing as it is for the pee-hole thing. You see, even though any of the five remaining Strictly Come Dancing contestants could theoretically win the show, really it's a two-horse between a couple of dancers. Which two? Read the headline again, dummy.

Here are the Strictly Come Dancing betting odds for Louisa Lytton and Mark Ramprakash… 

Louisa Lytton – Louisa Lytton is really nailing this 'second Strictly Come Dancing runner-up' tactic she's got going on, we don't mind telling you. Although on Eastenders Louisa Lytton was only really asked to look somewhat confused and shrug her shoulders twelve times a week, on Saturday's Strictly Come Dancing she was required to perform a Paso Doble – one of the most aggressively sexual dances there is. Now, for some the sight of a 12-year-old girl being aggressively sexual to a creepy-looking foreigner is enough to put them off their tea, but the Strictly Come Dancing judges became almost compulsively obsessed with it. After her performance to Left Outside Alone by Anastacia, though, they told Louisa Lytton what we already know – that she isn't too good at acting; "You are such a fearless dancer. I love working with fearless dancers. But you could have expressed the drama a little more through your face." SCORE – 34 – Current Strictly Come Dancing betting odds – 2/1

Mark Ramprakash – Sometimes, just sometimes, the planets align and create the perfect dancing environment, and there's a very good chance that this happened for Mark Ramprakash on Saturday's Strictly Come Dancing. After a couple of lousy weeks of dancing like a fool, Mark Ramprakash's Viennese Waltz routine had it all – he looked dapper, she looked beautiful, they twirled in perfect synchronicity and, to top it all, they were dancing to a Billy Joel song. What more could you possibly ask for? The Strictly Come Dancing judges were pushed for time afterwards and, while they didn't really comment on Mark's dancing, they said this about his partner: "You looked like a Christian Dior model on the catwalk in the 1950s," they said. And she did. It'll be tricky for Mark Ramprakash to top this next week. SCORE: 36 – Current Strictly Come Dancing betting odds – 11/10

Next week – X Factor again. And then Strictly Come Dancing. Like always.