Every year for the past million years, Sports Illustrated has put out its famous Swimsuit Edition, filled with some of the most bangable models in the world. The coveted cover almost exclusively goes to skinny white chicks with big boobs because, you know, that’s kind of Sports Illustrated’s thing. This year, however, there are three covers which, amazingly enough, feature three women with three completely different body types.
First, there is the traditional cover girl, the gorgeous Margot Robbie 2.0, Hailey Clauson, who fits all the typical stereotypes for an SI cover girl, but then there is also a cover featuring plus-sized mega babe and body positive advocate, Ashley Graham, and a third cover featuring ultimate bad bitch Ronda Rousey, who has, as most people know, an extremely athletic build. First Playboy stops showing naked women and now SI is showing different body types on their cover? WHAT IS GOING ON???
I’m sure a lot of people will argue that SI is still a bit behind because yes, they may be offering up different body types, but the cover girls are all still beautiful white women, and while I agree their models aren’t exactly racially diverse, in a world where the profession of modeling considers “plus-sized” anything over a size 6, I’ll gladly applaud SI for putting a size 16 woman on the cover of its famous bikini issue. And in world where women are told not to get “too big” or “too muscle-y”, I will gladly applaud them for featuring a woman who is one of the world’s greatest athletes and boasts a beautiful strong, athletic body.
I suddenly realized nothing I’d written thus far was even remotely humorous and all just kind of serious like YASSS, DIFFERENT FEMALE BODIES, so, just to sort of finish on an amusing/disturbing note, have you guys watched “Doc McStuffins” on Disney Junior? First of all, it’s a great show and I legit fucking love it and watch it even after my kid is gone to bed. There is no second of all, that was really my only point. Either way, the other night my husband was trying to get sexy with me and used the phrase “Cock McStuffins” which totally ruined my night, and I couldn’t help but think: is this was being a mom is? Only wanting to talk about making the world a more positive place for women and Disney Junior programs? Because, like, feminism or Jake and the Neverland Pirates or GTFO.