As pointless as skiing is – seriously, no, you strap those planks of wood and hurtle down a hill, we'll manage with pizza and a sofa thanks – it goes without saying that guns and exploding bodies would make the whole thing infinitely more interesting.

We never used to think that, of course, but Aggressive Alpine Ski has sort of convinced us. Aggressive Alpine Ski is just a normal skiing game, except men shoot you from cable cars. And cabin roofs jut out of the snow. And your skier explodes the instant he touches either. And the sky changes colour every couple of seconds. And the whole thing seems like some elaborate spoof of Japanese arcade games. We want more games like Aggressive Alpine Ski, and we want more of them now.

Play Aggressive Alpine Ski now