Sienna Miller Takes Off Her Top, Smooches It Up with Some Married Guy
Then buzz it up
July 15th, 2008 at 19:00 by Annette Hyde
Sienna Miller has committed a grievous crime. She was recently photographed off the coast of Italy all lovey-dovey with actor Balthazar Getty, who is married with four children.
Sienna’s crime: bad posture. A topless Sienna Miller, hunched over like a squatting monkey, making wild gestures– just let that image sink in for a second – revokes her standard ‘Hottie Waiver’ when it comes to any moral violations such as adultery. It also subjects her to the standard Dratch Infraction. This, of course, rates the seriousness of how unattractive a woman is compared to Rachel Dratch doing, well, anything.
We’ve been informed that all charges will be dropped if Sienna Miller goes away. Forever. Please electronically sign this post in the comments section to support this cause. You can make a difference!
Sienna Miller. Sure, she’s been in a movie or two, like that hideously pathetic movie where she dates Jude Law, breaks up with him for cheating on her, gets back together with him, then breaks up a few more times… wait, that wasn’t a movie? That was her real life? Yikes.
Anyway, having been in a relationship where she was apparently cheated on, it’s time for Sienna to take her turn as the other woman, as she seems to have entered the realm of dating married men like this bloke, Balthazar Getty. He’s on that TV show Brother’s & Sisters, so you probably don’t know who he is, but your middle-aged, divorced aunt sure does.
In classic celebrity fashion, Sienna and Balthy have been denying the romance, but that’s much harder to believe now pictures of the two of them vacationing together without much clothing and lots of kissing have come out. Sienna just recently broke up with her boyfriend Rhys Ifans, and before that she dated actor Matthew Rhys.
So, it looks as though Sienna is taking a break from dating guys with ‘Rhys’ somewhere in their name, but don’t expect it to last. The word on the street is that this hunch-backed gal has a call out to John Rhys-Davies, and is expecting his arrival in his sexy Gimli costume any day now.
Related and recent:
- Vandal Makes Sienna Miller’s House Say ‘Slut’
- Sienna Miller Gets Covered In Blood For GI Joe
- Sienna Miller & P Diddy Perhaps Possibly Porking?
- Did Sienna Miller Bugger Up Sean Penn’s Marriage?
- Sienna Miller Has ‘Mild Tourettes’
- Jude Law And Sienna Miller Tiresomely Split Up Again
- Sienna Miller: Blah Blah Paparazzi Boo Hoo
- 2006 Relationships Betting Odds - Jude And Sienna Getting Married?
July 15th, 2008 at 8:06 pm
Oh, here we go again…this girl was slutty before she ever got with Jude…Jude didn’t victimize her. She’s the same girl then as she is now, and has been around A LOT…even when she was with Jude.
So who cares about her? She’s never had my sympathy, admiration, envy, or movie dollars…and never will. NEXT???
July 15th, 2008 at 10:29 pm
After she runs out of ‘Rhys’ to date, word on the street is that Sienna is going to run off to Asia to date sacks of rice. She will undoubtedly be treated better…
July 16th, 2008 at 5:28 am
she is a pig- i bet their next move will be to pretend they were already seperated. another lie from the pathetic morally bankrupt pigs. i wouldn’t ever go see either one of them in anything. this woman doesn’t care about anyones feelings. i hope she really gets what she deserves.
July 16th, 2008 at 7:50 am
Having no idea who Bathazar Getty is, my mind immediately formed an image of Sienna Miller and Estelle Getty.
I will not be sleeping tonight. I will be scraping this terrifying vision off the back of my eyeballs.
July 16th, 2008 at 8:44 am
What, no scientologists on this thread?
YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND XENU!
July 16th, 2008 at 11:26 am
They were only kissing… on the lips… whilst semi-naked. No doubt this was a ‘friendly’ thank-you from Sienna to Getty for allowing her to holiday with him on a massive yacht and rub him with sun tan oil.. a lot… even in bed… Surely his wife will understand.
July 16th, 2008 at 8:04 pm
And why is any of this important?
July 17th, 2008 at 5:30 am
“And why is any of this important?”
I think that’s an important question to ask when you’re reading a celebrity gossip satire blog; right up there with “where did my life go so wrong?” and “is it down the road or across the street?”