Sienna Miller Has ‘Mild Tourettes’

Everything comes in diet form these days.

And rightly so - why shouldn't people be allowed the experience of guzzling down a tooth-decayin' can of Coke without having to worry about all those pesky calories? And if someone wants to rip open a bag of crisps and wolf them down like a ravenous pleb, why shouldn't they able to do so without the worry of fat clogging their greedy arteries?

Seriously - what's the alternative? Eat healthy? Like… fruit 'n' shit? Get real, Grandad. This is the way forward. The path to enlightenment.

A path being paved, incidentally, by young 'actress' Sienna Miller.

Not just content with reduced-fat versions of famous food brands, Sienna Miller has extended her remit to the world of crippling mental disorders, and announced that - in what must come as a shock to those cynical scientist-types - that she has a 'mild' form of Tourettes.

Funny, really. Hecklerspray has been suffering from Throat-Cancer-Lite for the last year now. It's not life-threatening or anything, but we're pretty much buggered whenever we want to sing I Will Always Love You down the Dog And Duck Karaoke Night.

Sienna's diagnosis - which we've no doubt is the result of vigorously thorough research -  stems from a string of foul-mouthed outbursts which she made last year, one of which hugely offended the residents of Pittsburgh when she referred to the location as 'Shittsburgh'.

Sienna explains:

"These things just come out. I think it might be mild Tourette's, not to insult people who have proper Tourette's, but I will say the most inappropriate things at the most inappropriate time to the most inappropriate person. Always. Guaranteed."  

Interestingly enough - and by pure coincidence, we're sure - Sienna was also reported to be rip-roaringly drunk at the time of the Shittsburgh incident. Which of course has nothing to do with anything.

Sienna Miller has yet to reveal any more details concerning the issue. This, we suspect, is mainly due to the fact that she's an essentially-talentless egocentric fool with her head wedged so permanently up her own arse that she might as well take out a mortgage there.

Gosh, we are sorry. These things just slip out sometimes.

Probably that Sugar-Free Schizophrenia that's going round, eh?

Read More:

Miller Blames Tourettes Syndrome For Shittsburgh Comment - Yahoo