Shocker of the Year: Chris Brown is a Terrible Boyfriend


Before I even get started I have to ask: HOW?! How is it that Chris Brown keeps getting beautiful women even though he is obviously the worst! I mean, this guy makes Justin Bieber look good, and that’s really saying something.

Ok, now that I’ve gotten that off my chest I can get back to business. As many of your may know, after Chris Brown and Rihanna broke up because he beat the shit out of her, Chris began dating the adorable Karrueche Tran. Then there was a weird love triangle between them, then he went back to Rihanna, and then he went back to Tran. It made zero fucking sense to me because they’re both beautiful girls and he’s a fucking dick.

But anyway, Tran has stuck by Brown’s side during all this other shit he’s been getting in trouble for ever since and homegirl must be brainwashed by the dick because she has put up with A LOT of shit from him, but I guess her dickmatization finally wore off because word is that right before he went to rehab she finally kicked his ass to the curb. Why, you ask? Because she finally realized he was TERRIBLE (that and he was sexting every girl whose name started with a letter of the alphabet).

First of all, I want to know who are these sad, confused girls who are sending sexy texts and pics to Chris Fucking Brown?! Were you more in 1999 and weren’t allowed to use the internet alone or read your mother’s magazines when he beat the shit out of Rihanna? Did you used to be Amish so you have no way of knowing anything about him until you broke free of your Amish ways last month and he was the first guy you met!? What is going on here?!?

So, it’s pretty obvious that Chris Brown has trouble with law and women. On Monday, we found out he got kicked out of rehab because of a) his alleged inappropriate contact with a woman in the rehab centre, and 2) he allegedly bragged about violence and guns. Al this fuckery landed him in jail, but you know who won’t be waiting for him this time? Karrueche.

Apparently, Karrueche went and visited Brown last month in rehab, and while there she decided to go through his texts (can’t really blame her after that she he pulled on her with Rihanna), where she found a fuck ton of inappropriate texts to numerous other women, because bitches be STUPID and think Chris Brown is even worth speaking to. Karrueche was super pissed and sources said:

We’re told Karrueche was especially pissed because she’d been nothing but supportive to Chris throughout his ordeal, even going to court with him.

You know what? Karrueche is just lucky she found those texts while he was in rehab, because one time Rihanna found texts from another woman on Brown’s phone and confronted him about it and we all know how that went.

I don’t get how these beautiful women keep flocking to that douche bag Chris Brown. To the next girl who things he is boyfriend worthy I say: