Shayne Ward: ‘I’m Not On The Social Just Yet, Bastards’
Hear that applause? No, us neither. That’s just how excited we all are that Shayne Ward is back on the scene and opening his fat trap again
Saturday evening, 2005: dreaming of that Porsche we’re supposed to own right about now in 2007, along with a villa in Cannes and a radio-controlled shark. Yet daydreaming can do more than reinforce just how little we've achieved in the last two years, it can also bring back pain-drenched memories of the X Factor final. You know, where Shayne Ward, that dim-witted Justin Timberlake lookalike, won the contest and then released some awful single about a particularly important goal he scored at football.
Riding off the back of his X Factor win and knowing full well that stupid girls named Courtney would buy him singing Bob The Builder if his face was on the cover, Shayne Ward released No Promises. It predictably reached number two (such an appropriate number) in the UK charts. Then came the album and it blew. Finally came Stand By Me, more listless rubbish that died a spectacular death in the charts, much the same way as Shayne’s voice box did a few months later.
Having found nodules on his vocal chords, doctors put Shayne in gentle recovery mode. In the meantime his aforementioned album gathered respectable sales in that much sought after Taiwanese market. Unfortunately then he got better and wanted to sing some new stuff again.
That pretty much brings us up to now, just a few weeks away from the imminent arrival of Shayne’s comeback single, If That’s Okay With You. All those gifted with more common sense than a prepubescent girl may as well stop picketing now, it’s coming out anyway. Though at least Channel 4’s Popworld has been given the shaft, so we won’t have to hear it on there.
If That’s Okay With You (and believe us it’s not) will be released alongside a lavish video shot in California’s Santa Monica, comprising of Mexican wrestlers, some nearly dressed ladies and Shayne Ward wandering around wearing lip-gloss. Don’t call him desperate, this is what a comeback’s all about; be a bit weird, be a bit kooky, become a woman.
If you want to aid in Shayne’s return or merely laugh at his desperate begging for scraps at J. Timberlake’s platinum encrusted table (think Blair and Bush analogy fans), check out some exciting on-set footage of his video for If That’s Okay With You here, then come back and tell us how shit it all is here. And do bear in mind that if you have anything nice to say about Shayne, his putrid voice, his shaven scalp or that he's possibly starring in a new movie directed by the now presumably braindead Oliver Stone, then this is not the place to do it.
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I thought he worked in a shoe shop and they are always after sales staff. Coming from MADCHESTER can he not join the reformed Smiths or play for City? Surely he has the World at his feet. Anyway what has happened to Leona Lewis and that cheeky scouser who just kept singing the same thing?
I applied for X Factor but was rejected as I didn’t have enough sick/dying/dead/terminally ill relatives. Pass the onion.
You’re such a bunch of twats with no life!
Shayne has worked SO unbelivably hard, and all you can do is sit on your backsides and criticise it, psh!
Dont see you lot with a career like his!
You seriously have no life lol!
So RUDE! What a load of shit! Idiot. That’s what i call JEALOUSY.
You Need your head sorting!!!
Shayne is the best pop sensations ever to hit Briton, this is proved because he won the X-Factor!!!!
Also he is being prosented with a Variety Award this has been given to the likes of Dame Cherly Bassy, Elton John, and Robbi Williams!
So get ya fucking heads sorted!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And you do know that shayne could have never been able to sing again because of the vocal cord nodules!!!!!!!!!!!! You are so sad that you want to make fun of him!
Well I can tell you never ever meet me on the street cos you will get ya fucking face kicked in!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You wouldn’t know what talent was if it hit you in the face!!!!!!!
and by the way can you sing??? I hear a NO! SO DON’T FUCKING MOCK SHAYNE! HE CAN SING BETTER THAN OTHER MORONS ON THIS PLANT!
SO SHUT THE FUCK UP!
Well i have to disagree with what your saying about shayne chris! He’s a very talented man with a fantastic voice and i think that if he had the right management behind him then he’s got the potential to do very well. And before you think that i’m a 14-15 year old fan then think again i’m 22 years of age and i adore shayne i think he’s great. And personally i don’t think that it’s a coincidence that his singles got to number 2 in the charts he’s got great support and fantastic fans around him that will buy his singles and love him to bits. i wish shayne very well for the future i went to see him in Dublin in January and will definately go see him again someday. (i do sense a hint of jealousey from you chris)
My husband applied for the x-factor and also got rejected and he’s got a fantastic voice quite similar to shayne’s. i do think it’s sad that you have to have a story behind you in order for the public to see your talent. Put the real talent through put in the people who deserve to go through!!
xxRachelxx
Hahahahahaahaha
This article is exactly what i’d expect from the pethetic jelous person that you are.
People like you just can’t accept that an ordinary person like yourself could suddenly become so famous and have so much success… You wish you had a talent like shayne, but you dont, so you take the piss. Maybe if you had a talent like then you wouldn’t be sat at your computer with nothing better to do than slag someone off.
Do you honestly have nothing better to do than write a load of crap like that about someone you obviously don’t like? You’re very sad, I actually feel sorry for you.
Shayne Ward has achieved huge international success Last month Shayne had just finished promoting his album in Asia where he is number 1 in 9 different countries.He had been away since March this year. He then went on to sweeden to work on the album WHICH IS OUT OCTOBER. couple of weeks ago he flew out to L.A to film the new video for his upcoming single “if thats ok with you” WHICH IS OUT 20TH AUGUST.
Variety Club of Great Britain is proud to announce it will be honouring Shayne Ward with a special Tribute Dinner to celebrate his outstanding achievements in the world of entertainment and music, this makes shayne the youngest ever person to achieve such award.
This artical wasnt worth reading i’ve just wasted 1 minute of my life reading crap like this!!!
Oh dear someone has a dose of the green eyed monster ! Shayne is gorgeous, talented and has the world at his feet and what difference it makes coming from a talent show and being discovered in another way, I am sure I have no idea ! Talent is talent anyway you look at it. Shayne has had huge sucess with his tour and album around the world and im sure his new single will go to No.1 which is due out 20th August. He is a true star ! and you are a jelous, sad man, well maybe your wife/girlfriend/boyfreind fancies him lol ! caz
omg shayne is an inspiration to all of his fans, yes he does have them.. and plenty of them!
you are so jealous of his amazing talent and gorgeous looks that u go round saying these nasty things about him.
go and get a life and then when his single comes out, you buy it, there’s a good man/woman .. whatever you are.. HE/SHE!!
Why is it that robots have such difficulty with spelling?