Scissors Lose a Sister

Like this story?
Then buzz it up

April 1st, 2005 at 11:15 by Chris Laverty

Creosote haired Ana Matronic is to take a break from co-fronting the Scissor Sisters with Jake Shears until the end of the year. 

This will hopefully give us all ample to time to figure out exactly what it is she does, besides from being inaudible over Shears’ spastic wailing of course.

Matronic is planning to spend more time with her husband Seth (as in Amos and Land Rover Defenders), to promote his, no doubt, lamentable band. 

Ironically she fancies a change of direction, “(His band is) mainly electronic based” commented Matronic-Mnemonic “it’s quite different from the Scissor Sisters”.

Evidently her eardrums have burst someone along the Sisters’ baffling route to Heat based stardom.  Pity ours don’t every time Laura excretes itself out the car stereo.

Read more about this story if you must…

Related and recent:

This entry was posted on Friday, April 1st, 2005 11:15 am and is filed under Music News. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.

3 Responses to “Scissors Lose a Sister”

  1. Music Blog Says:
    April 1st, 2005 at 9:02 pm

    Ana Matronic taking a break from scissor sisters

    One of my favorite bands is losing its second (by a nose) in command. I’m totally crushed….

  2. willy wanka Says:
    April 10th, 2006 at 12:31 am

    I personally would like to see the REAL sista’s without this Ana Matronic. ew… is that a stage name or what? She moves around the stage like madonna’s ill fated ghost, seems to not be able to sing… oh thats right, she did use to be an expert lipsinker artist…. pretends to be a lesbian…. claimed the name was derived from lesbians as if there ain’t no queen hair dressors pleaze!!!!and just comes across like some tired faghag to me. not that faghags are bad… where would we be without them… but Scissor Sisters need to be more MALE GAY… as in not kissing up to straights trying to be accepted by them to make a buck with a token whatever she is…. ripping off those drag queens act! indeed!… go get Rupaul child, now there’s a real Sista’ in need of money! come to think of it… she does look like ricki lake doing a bad rocky horror schtick on stage… i suppose we should be honored!
    as for the dvd… the return to oz ditty seems a wee contrived to suck up that gay dollar too!!!! maybe I’m just some bitch in a bubble… but I say let the queens be queens!!!! and lose the faux fox animatronic… and her “there ain’t no god” quip was just downright rude! sweety, you can be a sex fiend and believe in a god,goddess too!!!! and like Oprah… through the dvd she’s fat, she’s thin, she’s fat…. ah fuck it…think i should shutup already!! just buy the cd! ok… jake can tease my hair too! prick teaser (those damn strippers!) guess we’ll just drool!

  3. Sophie Says:
    August 24th, 2007 at 9:39 pm

    you fuckers dont know anything.

    Ana is twice the person you will ever be. And anyone that makes fat jokes is perverted.

    Fuck you losers.

Leave a Reply