Imagine, right, that you toddled on down to your local WHSmiths. Then imagine that you grabbed hold of every magazine and scribbled out every single word, replacing it instead with the word ‘unfunny’. Then imagine that you stood there and read the whole caboodle out loud, in a deeply monotonous and unfunny voice.
This would still not be as unfunny as Russell Brand.
The screeching and hopelessly ubiquitous chancer (why do people like him exactly? Oh, that’s right – they’re idiots) has, however, at least had his gurning mug removed from one channel at least. MTV – in a rare show of intelligence – has decided to axe Russy-boy’s ‘entertainment showcase’ 1 Leicester Square.
This follows the disastrous flop earlier in the year of Brand’s E4 vehicle Russell Brand’s Got Issues – issues which presumably involve warbling through deeply irritating non-performances with the misguided satisfaction of someone convinced that they’ve bettered Lenny Bruce in the funnyman stakes. hecklerspray saw an episode once. It was as funny as a baby with leukaemia.
The ‘stylish trendsetter’ – or, if you share hecklerspray’s point of view, the ‘man who looks like Worzel Gummidge’s ‘special’ younger brother taking part in a Pete Doherty twat-alike contest’ – is reportedly ‘disappointed’ by the news.
It’s not all good news, though. Brand is all set to continue his excruciating rise to ‘the top’ with a planned Channel Four show later in the year as well as a Radio 2 show. And a new sitcom.
When asked to comment, Russell flailed his arms about and said:
“Ooh! Touch my winkle! You know, it really is a jolly great laugh being a sub-rate Kenny Everett impersonator with all the humour, charm, wit and talent of a circumcision ward leftovers bin.”
Probably.
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DeusXM says
Oh, that’s just made my day. I thought I was the only one who wanted to spend five minutes locked in room with Russell Brand and a variety of heavy blunt objects. Thank god for that.
Mika says
What a crock of shit, the guy is probably the funniest guy I have seen since Chris Morris, but then again he was hated by mainstream England too, one of the best stand up comedians, who pisses on overated shit like Peter Kay et al.
Its funny the criticisms of him in this article come from his appearance. Quite clearly one of the more intelligent funny men out there.
louis says
a crap article, i should have expected it from the ‘Heckler Spray’ website (who?) Russ is one of the funniest, most intelligent and witty comedians in England, just watch him on Jonathon Ross or the Big Fat Quiz of the Year. The writer of this article and most of the other Russell Brand haters base their opinions on 1st impressions and have haven’t watched any more than 1minute of him. i suggest that next time this writer publishes an article he/she does some more research
Roy Le Pre says
Now look what Hecklerspray’s done !
Gone and upset all those billions and billions of Brandophiles out there in the world. Tsk tsk tsk! C.J. Davies ought indeed, as so wisely and benevolently counselled, to do his homework the next time he chooses to write about Brand.
The redeeming factor must be this – that Brand is so good that he deserves no article nor mention at all – even that monumental institution MTV (bow, bow) [ the action of genuflecting,
I mean, not the canine sound] has chosen to omit him from their performances.
I mean, come on! Give it to the man – he’s a fine sight for tired eyes, isn’t he? Presentable, dashing in his long tresses, articulate, mature in his approach in mentioning severed prepuces, pulling
classic grimaces, simultaneously camp and not camp. What more could they need, or want?
He’s just so funny, the tears just roll out like rapids from the eyes, on mere sight, let alone joke. Such extreme character, dashing garments and facepulling – we’d never suspect Brand of a deep-rooted inferiority complaex, at all, would we?
Holly says
The person who wrote this article is the epitome of the saying “Hatred is the coward’s revenge for being intimidated”. Does Russell intimidate you? So he should…he’s brilliant!!!!
J Bollocks says
Much as Iiii hattttte beinggg seeeeen to supppppppppport HecklerSprayyyy, my luvvies theyyyy doo have a bonnneee to chewww so to sayyy, ai my lovelies……..
Actually I quite liked Brand in the latest St Trinians.
Brent Rayl says
Russel brand insulted over half of america and the paulin family. I hope viacom gets lots of hate mail as they should that bum should not even be on the radio…
In fact the fcc should haul him away or the epa because
his smell and them good old british teeth have to be a crime. I wish he would come to the midwest so i could introduce to my ballbat….
yoof says
People who find Russell Brand idiots? I have never heard such bull in my life – it’s actually the other way round – most people don’t get Brand’s post-modern take on the banility of life, because THEY are too Stupid or too self-satisfied to get him, or too goddamm prejudiced to understand his theatrical satire. CJ Davies – go back to your farkin’ Peter Kay-a-like safe-and-obvious family humour. Douchebag.