Oh, it was fun to begin with, wasn't it? Rosie O'Donnell goes on The View and gets all like "Oh Donald Trump is such a lousy peestick," and Donald Trump gets all like "Hey, you shut your cakehole you fat dyke," and everybody laughed for a moment.
But then this whole Rosie O'Donnell Vs Donald Trump squabble went on. And on. And on. Now, like two beefy pre-Queensbury heavyweights laboriously slugging at each other in the 138th round on some fight everybody's already got bored of, Rosie O'Donnell has unspectacularly hit back at Donald Trump for whatever the last thing he said about her was by claiming that Donald Trump is obsessed with her. And if Donald Trump is even close to being as obsessed with Rosie O'Donnell as Rosie O'Donnell is, that's a hell of a lot.
Tara Conner has got a hell of a lot to answer for. If Miss USA hadn't starting having drug-crazed, pissed-up bisexual sex with everyone all the time then none of this would have ever happened. Donald Trump wouldn't have decided to give her a second chance, Rosie O'Donnell wouldn't have done a middling impression of Trump and accused him of going bankrupt on live TV and Donald Trump wouldn't have retaliated in such a spectacular way.
OK, actually that bit was fun, especially since it provoked Donald Trump into unleashing the most gloriously epic anti-Rosie tirade that we think we'll ever hear. It was perfect – full of words like "disgusting" and "failure" and "loser" and "fat" – but that was enough. When Barbara Walters went on The View a few days later to say she prefers Rosie O'Donnell to Donald Trump, it wasn't quite as exciting. And now that Rosie O'Donnell has had another pop at Donald Trump for calling her fat… well, most people just wish Danny DeVito would come on drunk and burp up some more vomit, just for a change of scene. But here's what Rosie O'Donnell said this time, courtesy of Forbes:
"It's the way I look. He can't resist. I love when people say you're fat like you don't know," O'Donnell joked Monday on ABC's "The View." "… It's always the first comment of someone who disagrees with you if you happen to be on the plus side."… [Barbara Walters] expressed a wish that "we could rise above it." "It's not we, it's him," said O'Donnell. "He's doing every show in America. He's on QVC talking … The guy, he's obsessed with me, obviously."
Predictably however, Donald Trump had a snappy comeback for all this:
"I used the word `slob,' I used the word `degenerate' and I used the words `not very smart.' The word `fat' played a very small role, if any, in my description of her."
We get the impression that Donald Trump has learnt how to stretch an idea out until it stops being interesting from his time on The Apprentice. Soon we're expecting Martha Stewart to pop up and briefly throw some half-baked insults in Rosie's direction before Donald Trump comes back and takes Rosie O'Donnell off to LA for some more insulting, where this time one of them will be staying in a tent.
Or maybe we're missing the point of this cripplingly overdone playground name-calling. In fact, we've decided that it's only a matter of time before Rosie O'Donnell and Donald Trump meet face to face, stare each other down for a moment or two and then start tearing at each other's clothes in the most harrowing display of raw animal bad-haired hetero-to-lesbian love-making the human race has ever encountered.