It's hard to think of a time when Paul McCartney's reputation has been more in need of help. With recent claims that he frequently went into berserko stabbing frenzies all up and down Heather Mills' arm, Paul McCartney needs a friend.
And – what's this coming over the horizon? – it looks like a friend has arrived, albeit a friend with nasty dress sense and a haircut that looks like he's been exploded by a comedy bomb. It's Rod Stewart! And, of course, by 'friend' we mean 'man with an album to sell' since Rod Stewart has chosen now to discuss the divorce proceedings between Paul McCartney and Heather Mills. Rod Stewart is under the impression that Paul McCartney should fight Heather Mills in court. Perhaps not the best advice for an alleged wife-beater, but there you go.
Rod Stewart's bloody everywhere at the moment isn't he? Even though he was supposed to quit music a while ago, Rod Stewart is back with new album called Rod Stewart Massacres Every Song You've Ever Loved, or something. Maybe the new album has something to do with all the money Rod owes that Las Vegas casino, we're not sure; but the fact is that Rod Stewart is back, baby, and dead-eyeing through X Factor appearances as he goes. And, if it helps shift a few more copies of his album, Rod Stewart is even prepared to talk about his old mucker Paul McCartney.
We all know that Paul McCartney isn't having the best of times since his marriage to one-legged whip-licker Heather Mills went awry. Since then Paul McCartney and Heather Mills have seen their split get nasty with royal lawyers hired and bizarre lock-changing incidents, but lately things have really started heading south for Paul McCartney, with Heather Mills apparently making claims of drug-fuelled wine glass-based spouse abuse and even suggesting that Paul McCartney beat up Linda McCartney, too. Paul McCartney denies all this of course, but that isn't stopping Rod Stewart from wading in like the opportunistic West End musical-having spiky-haired fool he is. In an interview with Chris Evans, Rod Stewart said:
"I think he should fight her. I think his name has been slurred. I'm sure that he is not a wife-beater. He might be a drugtaker but I don't think he's a wifebeater. I think he should fight it. I don't think he should settle."
Rod Stewart is one of the foremost authorities on divorces, having divorced approximately half the female population of the universe at one point or another, and so Paul McCartney would do well to listen to Rod Stewart's divorce advice, the main points of which, in summary, are as follows:
*Paul McCartney should fight her
*Paul McCartney's name has been slurred
*Rod Stewart is sure Paul McCartney is not a wife-beater
*Rod Stewart thinks Paul McCartney probably takes quite a lot of drugs
*Rod Stewart doesn't think Paul McCartney is a wife-beater
*Paul McCartney should fight "it" whatever "it" is
*Paul McCartney shouldn't settle
*Please buy Rod Stewart's new album so he can shut up and go away again
Read more:
MACCA'S NO WIFE-BEATER, SAYS ROD STEWART – Mirror
[story by Stuart Heritage]