Red Hot Chili Peppers Split Up For Not Long Enough

Hear that? It’s the sound of no ropey funk-rock jam workouts. Lovely, isn’t it? And best of all, it’s a noise you’ll be hearing a lot from now on.

That’s because Red Hot Chili Peppers have announced that they’re splitting up. We know, we were distraught too – what were the Red Hot Chili Peppers if not The Beatles of bad funk-rock that all sounds identical?

But, hey, relax – it’s only a temporary split! According to Red Hot Chili Peppers singer Anthony Kiedis, the group is disbanding for ‘a minimum of one year’ so that they can focus on other things for a while. So, although there won’t be a new Red Hot Chili Peppers album any time soon, at least you’ll be able to console yourself with the upcoming Flea Makes A Directionless Bim-Bom-Bim-Bom Noise Up And Down The Neck Of His Bass For More Than A Day 32-CD solo boxset.

It’s been almost exactly two years since Red Hot Chili Peppers released their last album, entitled Stadium Lampshadium – and that means that if you’re a die-hard Red Hot Chili Peppers fan it’s been almost exactly one year, 11 months, two weeks and four days since you got about three tracks into it, realised that it contained nothing but shallow retreads of other stuff they’ve already done before and promptly forgot that it even existed.

But don’t you be expecting a new Red Hot Chili Peppers album any time soon – there won’t be one soon. There might not even be one ever. Red Hot Chili Peppers are on a trial separation, you see, because playing two hours of music a night to tens of thousands of adoring fans like you’ve dreamed of doing ever since you were a little boy can make you sooo tired. According to The Mirror:

California-referencing rock-funk veterans Red Hot Singer Chili Peppers have announced they are disbanding for the next 12 months after becoming exhausted with their hectic schedule. Frontman Anthony Kiedis told US rock mag Rolling Stone: “We didn’t really stop until the tour ended last year. We were all emotionally and mentally zapped at the end of that run. The discussion was, ‘Let’s not do anything Red Hot Chili Peppers-related for a minimum of one year, and just live and breathe and eat and learn new things.’”

Wow, yes, OK, we take it back – if you haven’t even had time to eat or even to perform your body’s basic automatic respiratory function since 1999 like you’re claiming, Red Hot Chili Peppers, then by all means take a break. Take as long as you need! You’ve earnt it! Heck, take forever off if you need to! No, really. Take forever off. We insist.

As Kiedis says, though, this will be an important year for the various members of the Red Hot Chili Peppers because they’re all going to try new things. Kiedis is going to raise a son, the drummer has joined a jazz band, John Frusciante is working on solo stuff and Flea is going to try not to burn any more houses down.

However, there’s always the chance that, after their year off, the various Red Hot Chili Peppers will have got used to living at home in comfort and they’ll decide to make the split permanent.

And you know what that means – it means that there’ll be a TV show called Californication but no band performing a song called Californication. In other words, it means that Duchovny has won! That’s terrible! We don’t know which scenario is worse – a world where the Red Hot Chili Peppers still exist or a world where Duchovny gets to ramp up his cloying smugness a couple of notches. We lose either way. It’s just like being a child with two abusive parents. Um, we’d imagine.

Read more:

Rockers Red Hot Chili Peppers split – for at least a year – Mirror

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Comments

  1. Sarah says

    Wow, then what kind of music do you like? Something like Green Day or U2? Get some music taste, asshole.

  2. rhcp says

    You simply do not understand good music. Anthony Kiedis is an awesome frontman, flea is one of the best bassists who is still going today and chad is a beast on the drums How could any band with John Frusciante be bad? He is a fucking genius. Red Hot Chili Peppers have been putting amazing sounds in the air for over 20 years now. you are a hater my friend.

  3. 7ate9 says

    You, are a complete twat who lacks musical taste in any form. even if u dislike their music theres no denying they lack musical talent, which is something im sure you do.

    They are a fucking great band, whatever style they choose to play, and the beautiful energy they give out with their voices and instruments in one show is more than you could give off in a lifetime.

    grow up, show some respect, and buy some new records you fucking arrogant cunt.

  4. Katie says

    The Chili Peppers are amazing. I guess you would know that if you weren’t too busy waiting in line for Miley Cyrus tickets.

  5. Tom says

    why can’t you see the difference in taking a break from a band and stop making music all together.
    Is your head really so far up your own ass to realise the not-so-subtle difference of ‘taking a vacation’ as opposed to ‘stopping with your life philosophy.’
    If you even think artists like Frusciante and Flea are even considering spending a year without making or practicing music at all you are in no position to make a comment about their ‘crap’ album.

    People change, they grow up, they evolve. Their music changes in a parallel path. Or do you think somebody like a Salvador Dali made the same art when he was 60 as opposed to his 15 year old self?

    Music is a matter of taste.
    But your lack of respect tells me you’re missing out of something in your life.
    Take a look in the mirror and have a long think about yourself. Chances are you’ll realise that you’re actually quite pathetic.

  6. says

    What is a matter with you? You have issues. RHCP fucking rule, great music and great band all in all!

    They deserve some alone time without having to be away from their familys and such.

    Incolent prick

  7. Lizzy! says

    YOu fucking ass!
    the red hot chili peppers are the best.
    you have no right to say that.
    its NOT funny.
    its NOT entertaining.
    its fucking stupid.
    i just came here to see if they split up for good, i didnt need some homo to dis them, about 70 times!
    you fuck!
    rhcp have earned their respect.
    read anthony kiedis’s book ‘scar tissue’…and maybe you should actually listen to one of their songs.
    i feel horrible now..
    this is a load of crap.
    i want facts.
    not your bias thoughts!
    red hot chili peppers kick ass!!

  8. Dan says

    oh my god dude i would love to beat the shit out of you.. or watch you perform a world tour for almost a decade which would be just as bad as getting the shit beat out of you, if not worse

    you obviously know nothing about being in a band, or flying across the world in a day and giving all of your energy for loving fans and doing it again the next day

    being in a band myself, i know that it is rough balancing out your priorities, especially when one is new born child, and you deserve a break after a while

    you obviously dont know how to analyze anything, so do us all a favor and get the hell off of the internet with these poorly thought out rants you post

  9. gir says

    OH MY GOD DUDE I WANT TO BEAT YOU UP BECAUSE YOU MADE FUN OF A BAND I LIKE ON THE INTERNET GET OFF THE INTERNET WITH YOUR POORLY THOUGHT OUT RANTS WHILE MY CAREFULLY CONSIDERED DESIRE TO PHYSICALLY HURT YOU REMAINS EVEN THOUGH IM OBVIOUSLY A PIMPLY HIGH SCHOOL TWERP WHO PLAYS IN THE MARCHING BAND AND JUST ACTS LIKE A TOUGH GUY ON THE INTERNET

    my fave quote: “being in a band myself, i know that it is rough balancing out your priorities, especially when one is new born child”

    There are two possible interpretations here, and because I have no commitment to the truth I might as well assume that the author is a newborn child. Which would explain the content of the message, but wow, how amazing, a newborn learned to use a computer you go girl.

  10. cyro says

    You are a fucking fool. You obviously know nothing about music you gutless prick

  11. euclid says

    Hey Cyro;
    Calling someone a gutless prick on the Internet
    without even posting your real name is a self-canceling act.
    Put down the mirror when you type.

  12. Dan says

    gir… wow
    what did your comment even mean?

    you have no clue who i am, but im pretty sure youre an ignorant prick who decided to take your anger out on me because you have nothing else to do

    i said that since anthony kiedis (vocalist if you didnt know) had a child not long ago, that that is his top priority now and they deserve a break.. do i have to spell it out any more for you or do you understand?

    your pointless rant might even be worse than the author of this article

    congratulations, really

  13. gir says

    Actually, I know that you’re some dumb fag who attaches his ego to terrible bands to such a degree that he has to threaten physical violence against anyone who makes fun of them on the internet. The rest is just conjecture.

    Actually, what you said was “being in a band myself, i know that it is rough balancing out your priorities, especially when one is new born child, and you deserve a break after a while”

    Which, thanks to your penchant for faulty pronoun references and kindergarten-level writing skills, I was able to cleverly interpret to my whim, thus inferring that you are a baby. I then supported that interpretation with solid evidence, and offered my amazement at the youth of today.

    You’re an idiot.

  14. Roy Le Pre says

    I say! What an amiable atmosphere this article has induced. Exactly what I have been in need of all day to boost my flagging spirits.

    Anyway, and on a considerably less than not-so-but somewhat-serious note, Stuart, you really ought to know better than to go and offend billions and billions of bilious fans, both dudes and dudettes, of The RHCP. Quite irresponsible of you, you know.

    I mean, tut tut and more tut! Nay, tutting galore. Wait! Did you hear that deafening click? That was the global tut resonating in disapproval at you.

    I hope you will seize this rare opportunity to turn over a brand spanking new leaf, as I am sure being eulogised as a male member lacking intestinal capacity [see comment of yesterday at 4.49pm] must be quite an eye-opener, hmm? Hmm??

    Such bands are mostly if not always quite, quite infallible you know, and to poke fun and take the Michael out of a group of such celestial standing and quality is an act hardly deserving of magnanimousness. It is the bien-etre of the global masses and rock riffraff (note: small “R”) at stake here.

    Mess thee not, m’lad, with the minds of men (and of course women), no matter how small and modest (minds, not people).

  15. gir says

    That was a lot of two dollar words to say that idiots are gonna complain if you insult their favorite bands.

  16. Roy Le Pre says

    Indeed, gir.

    Well spotted.

    The tragedy is that they come naturally, these $2 words.

  17. Jojo says

    First three tracks on “Stadium Archadium” (which you did not specify which c.d., so I’ll assume the first one (Jupiter)) are:
    Dani California
    Snow (Hey oh)
    Charlie

    Please let me know which “shallow retreads of other stuff they’ve already done” you are referring to, because I clearly have missed it

  18. Brett says

    WoW you are a fucking joke….”what were the Red Hot Chili Peppers if not The Beatles of bad funk-rock that all sounds identical” the beatles and RHCP are two of the greatest bands of all time. Who the fuck are you but a dumb critic that no one give a shit about. You should go kill youself, your a joke as a journalist and its pretty obivious your deaf and cant hear great music. You wouldent know talent if you were sucking its dick. Fuck you Sir.

  19. J.Jarm says

    I hate to nitpick, but I felt the need to dissect this article.
    “Funk rock jam workouts”? Maybe in the early years of RHCP that would have been applicable, but nowadays I don’t think you can classify them as funk rock, which can either be considered a compliment to their evolving musical style (I personally like their more sombre and moody songs) or as a shift towards mainstream stadium rock. Either way all the musicians of RHCP are immensely talented, and as a bassist and drummer myself I appreciate Fleas incredible technical style and ability to melodically voice musical ideas, as well as Chads if somewhat simple yet always rhythmically sound drum backing. So don’t insult their musicality, because you would be wrong to do so.
    “All sounds the same.” This bespoke volumes of ignorance on behalf of the writer, sadly. The Chilis have come a long way from their first albums, and having listened to all of them I can fairly confidently say that while some musical ideas are re-used (which is true for any band; styles of music are always evident in every genre) the songs vary greatly from album to album. However if you mean songs on one album, what do you expect? The Chilis aren’t a jazz four piece, and they will do what they feel and what they know. It would be like asking 50 Cent to do Mozart.
    Ah, a bad name related joke. Well done. Picking words out of the air that sound funny may endear you to the public. Until they realise you may be partially retarded.
    Next, touring is hard work. Take a break from exercising your wee fingers on the keyboard, learn how to play guitar and then tour and record for 20 years. See how much downtime you get, and how much you can use to see your family. Quite aside from the mental stress of maintaining the band, practicing, instrument breakages etc. there are also physical detriments that can be caused by excess stress. So don’t knock Kiedis’ words before you have experienced it firsthand.
    At least dignify “the drummer” with a name. Repeat after me; “Chad Smith is the drummer, and he is better than me.”
    Next, snubbing Flea for and accident is uncalled for. I burnt off my eyebrows yesterday, and would be riled if some critic railed me about it. So leave the poor man alone.
    Finally, your needless insults at the end of the article leave a bitter taste in my mouth. The Chilis will hopefully be back after sharing new experiences, and god willing they will release a new album, and another after that. So take your smarmy jibes and shove ‘em.
    (P.S. Judging by the vitriol in this article, the author probably did have abusive parents. I hope I don’t touch a nerve.)
    Joe.

  20. jordan williams says

    your just jealous that anthony kiedis has made more money in two hours than you would have in your whole ENTIRE LIFE!

  21. gir says

    ATTN: J.Jarm: in the interest of saving time, I am going to pick a sentence at random from your dissertation.

    “I burnt off my eyebrows yesterday, and would be riled if some critic railed me about it.”

    HAHAHAHAHA you dumb fuck. Although I wonder if we could start identifying red hot chili peppers fans by the evidence of their moronic accidents. Like, the lack of eyebrows and the smell of burnt hair just alerts you to the presence of some idiot who thinks Flea isn’t worthless white trash.

  22. J.Jarm says

    Just because I have a moronic accident does not 1) Imply I am a Red Hot Chili Pepper fan or 2) Imply I do not have a brain.
    Flea, worthless white trash?
    Casual racism now? What’s the point?
    Flea is talented. That’s what got him to where he is today, presumably in a fucking nice house with plenty of money and a comfortable lifestyle, doing what he enjoys most for a living. But evidently you believe he is worthless. Fair enough, you are entitled to your opinion, but don’t begrudge him the fact that he is a vastly experienced musician and successful because of this.
    But oh well. I’m sure you have other bands to criticize. I wouldn’t want to waste your time or anything.

  23. says

    You my friend are a Cunt. Sort your life out before i get anthony kiedis to elbow drop you to the face. RHCP rock your mothers cock. I take it you have never been to see them live with another 80,000 people. Hmm seems that you really do loose at life.

  24. die hard RHCP fan says

    … Idiocy, truly you obviously are a gay,piece of shit, who I’m assuming has no friends, i’m 15 and I have had more intelligence than you for years. Now i know i’m considerably young and most idiots my age are way into this retarded rap craze. But seriously, critics are pointless, this one seems to base his article entirely on personal tastes, however bad they be. As a last statement, I would enjoy physically assaulting you and you are a douchebag.

  25. die hard RHCP fan says

    I seemed to have made bad transitions, I would like to try to compensate by saying. I hate rap and I love most types of rock

  26. gir says

    You know what, Nick and flip?  I don’t think he’s really your friend at all!  What kind of a friend calls their friend an asshole or a cunt?  He is just trying to help you correct you misguided fanboyism!!

  27. REPORTER says

    dear Stuart Heritage,
    Because of my experience i will assume you are unhappy with your current situation. Maybe you were in a band in the past that never cut it so now you find your only feelings of pleasure and self accomplishment in critisizing one of musics most historical and sucusessful band, The Red Hot Chili Peppers. You should be ashamed you lack the professionalism. The only correct thing now is that you be fired from the company, unless that is hecklerspray is on a mission to lose business.
    I wish you the best of luck, maybe I will find a decent column under your name sometime in the future but I hightly doubt it. BTW, turns out i know a few of the RHCP band members and i have the umost respect for them, turns out they earned this respect. Hopefully you learned a thing or two.
    K. Moone

  28. PamB says

    wow, SH. you have nothing but time to write stupid shit like this.

    Nothing but time, TV dinners, and blow up dolls.

  29. gir says

    Boy, the impenetrable fortress of logic built by “Jack” sure has convinced me of the error of my ways.

  30. bobby says

    I find it horrible that such obviously great people who all happen to be smart enough to comprehend the magnitude of awesomeness that the aura of RHCP gives off are fighting amongst each other. Shouldn’t we all be ranting, raving, and finding out the adress, social security number, and bank account number of the fucking whore that wrote this piece of shit? I mean come on! we all need to put away our crticism of each other and translate it into a total annhilation of the twat-berry chode-muffin that wrote this in such an anal way that he will beraped upon sight by so many nice people, people who are concious of what constitutes good music and what is the deciding factor between a whore, a jack-ass, and a mother-fucking asshole, of which this author is all three
    Fuck government!
    IN FLEA WE TRUST!!!!!

  31. nicky says

    this guy is an arsehole, do you know how many gigs they do a year??? you try it, have you written any songs?? let us hear it and we can rate you you looser, yeah thats right you just slag off other people, bad karma on you mate, get a life ok

  32. The Todd says

    Yeah, I’m not going to flame the writer of this post, or say he’s a bad person with bad music taste or anything. Music goes on a taste by taste basis. If he doesn’t like RHCP, that’s his buisness. For me, they are one of my two favorite bands, up there with Pink Floyd.

    I just hope none of the members of RHCP read this article. I guess they’ve known for a long time by now that nobody can please everyone, so maybe it wouldn’t be too bad on ‘em. All the same though.

    I don’t think the members of RHCP would be too impressed by people threatening to rape the writer of this article and fuck him up and all this shit. Get over it guys. It’s just this one person’s opinion. Doesn’t make RHCP suck at all if one person dislikes them, or if 1000 people dislike them. They’re still rockin’. This this guy a break. He can like what he wants, and chances are, there are other bands that you like a lot that the writer thinks are amazing as well.

    To the people telling the writer shit like “bad karma on you” and that he needs to “get a life…” I don’t think it’s in your hands to decide who needs to get a life and who doesn’t.

    Just my two cents, have a nice day. Long live the Chili Peppers. :)

    - Michael-Todd

    PS: Yes, Flea is an incredible bassist.

  33. jae curtis says

    MAKE YOUR A FUCKING CUNT
    THE RED HOT CHILI PEPPERS HAVE BEEN AN INSPIRATION TO ALOT OF PEOPLE
    AND YOUR MUSIC STYLE OF MILEY CYRUS IS FUCKIGN SAD.
    THE RED HOT CHILI PEPPERS ARE MORE ABOUT THER LYRICS THANTHER ACTUAL SOUND AND FOR THAT SO MANY PEOPLE LOVE THEM INCLUDING ME MATE
    SO I SUGGEST YOU LISTEN TO SOME FUCKING MUSIC ONCE INA WHILE INSTED OF BEIGN SOME DUMB CUNT JOURNO WHO WANKS OFF TO MEN

  34. says

    The Chili Peppers are amazing. I guess you would know that if you weren’t too busy waiting in line for Miley Cyrus tickets.

  35. Stabby McGee says

    “The Chili Peppers are amazing.”

    Yeah, I don’t know how they managed to keep fooling people into buying the same album over and over for this long, either.

  36. says

    to sum it up, you are a complete asshole
    how can you be called music critics if you slag off everything you dont personally like?
    if Stadium Arcadium was soooo shit then why was it more successful and got more recognition than you have ever achieved in your sad, pathetic, little life?
    if they are such a crap band then look at how log they were together for, all the albums they produced and sold successfully, the meaningful lyrics in each song and the beautiful instrumentation, and they wouldnt have got that far if it wasnt for their fans.
    just goes to show, more people like them than like you.
    just do us all a favour and fuck off, and learn to appreciate music in all forms whether you like it or not.

  37. Jeff says

    RHCP rocks!!

    Kinda funny how not a single person that has replied to your story has agreed with you yet at all. What does that tell you? Next time actually listen to a bands music before you down them.

  38. Mark says

    I find solace in the fact that, to those musicians, and evidently all the people who have read this article, your views are utterly insignificant (basically youve failed in every possible way as a writer). Despite this i also tried to see through your perspective but some of your statements are just completely wrong, you havent researched your ideas as you blatently didnt even note “the drummer”. I have a strong feeling that music journalism isn’t your usual style as you are so bias and closed minded that you cant have been listening to those songs, which have a huge range of styles and technique not just “funk rock”, look at the difference between hump de bump and under the bridge, completely different. I personally feel that RHCP are one of the greatest modern bands and hope they continue but if they dont so be it they deserve it for the sheer talant and great songs theyve brought to the music scene for the past 20 years, try actually involving yourself in the music scene next time you write a music article you ignorant fuck.

    i doubt people would have even minded your criticism if you had done it proffesionally (everyone has their own tastes and that is a part of what makes music great) but you were soo childish and immature in your views that it’s provoked a mass scale onslaught of you (i’m only 16 and im more musically and creatively developed than you)

    lastly i feel that RHCP are an amazing band and i wish i had a tenth of the talant they had, the writer of this article has been officialy OWNED! (maybe you could redeem yourself with something well written?)

    thanks 4 reading

  39. Jason says

    You Idiot!!!
    How could you say that about them!
    They have been the best funksters of the past 2-3 decades
    Fuck you!!you insolent piece of shit.
    Their music has feeling..soul!!
    not like other shits that the “artists” dont even make
    THEIR COMPOSERS DO!!

    Listen to “Under the Bridge”
    probably the best song ever
    is pure from John Frusciante

    Fuck You
    get some respect!!

  40. Broseph says

    I agree with you but I also have something to day. 1, Anthony keides is a good front man, bit not a good singer. 2, john frucsiante is an amazingly talented guitarist, but I believe that their original guitarist, hillel Slovak, fit better with the band. But don’t get me wrong, rhcp has been my favorite band for as long as I can remembr and I love every single one of their songs.

  41. says

    First, i like the chili peppers, all of them. From the beginning of their dirty funk to whatever you want to call stadium arcadium. But why does everyone hear seem so angry. Music should bring people together so calm down and stop bashing others. If you don’t like their music, fine, but why would you go around making an effort to piss other people off? Honestly, i don’t know why im writing this because im sure someone will end up calling me some aweful name but think about. Soon you’ll see the light…just don’t walk into it that would be bad.

  42. david says

    dude…ur entitled to ur opinion but ur a dumshit. learn to love music…and start to learn to hate people like you…anything meaningful is beautiful

  43. I hate whoever wrote this article says

    I hate you.
    You motherfucker. The red hot chili peppers are the best fucking band in the fucking world. You have no taste in music. If i was in a room with you and Hitler and i had one bullet i would shoot you. I fucking hate you. Red Hot Chili Peppers are the best band that ever graced this planet.

  44. nicole says

    i think you need to get some new ears because you clearly havent been able to hear rhcp all these years. how about you take a permantent break from being a drama queen?

  45. Tim says

    Guess what, your possibly the most ridiculous person i have ever heard of. Do you breathe bullshit, your a complete no body and you think you have the right to slag off some of the most famous rock musicians in history. Please keep this kind of shit to you sad little self cause no one cares for you.

  46. guywhohatesthejackassthatwrotethis says

    ur a fuckin dushbag if they can sellout to thousands of fans every concert they play then clearly they ve done something right. they are a great band and u shood spend less time jerkin off to blogs and more time figurin out the quickest way to kill urself cus ur a terrible person.

  47. RHCP are mediocre. says

    I’m sure they’re glad they’ve fans like you,shitwit.They’re mediocre at best,and have been this way since Blood Sugar.How anyone can listen to those tedious harmonies on the album “By the way” is beyond me.As long as they’re followed by morons like you,they’ll carry on believing their own hype,and produce more unimaginative shite.

  48. fuckyou says

    gossip for grown ups?? you talk like a fukin bitchy schoolgirl. RHCP fucking kick ass!!! but i suppose you must just be a sad lonley very old person who has no zest for life anymore, i guess its fair enough if you dont like them, but bitching they way you are about it is just fukin pathetic. and so far nobody agrees with you in this story, shame