5 Reasons Why You Should Hate Ke$ha

Walking controversy Ke$ha may just be the worst thing that the 21st century has given us. In fact, she may be the worst thing humanity has ever had to deal with – throughout all history. That’s right, I’m placing her alongside the bubonic plague, HIV/AIDS and the mysterious dancing curse of 1518.

She may well be the worst thing ever. And I can’t even say it’s not her fault – it is. She’s just a poor excuse for humanity, with few redeeming qualities. (The one redeeming quality is that occasionally – very occasionally – her music burrows its way into the recesses of your mind and hatches larvae which breed and remain in your brain forevermore. But then you remember that it’s not called ‘Tick Tock’ like it should be, but ‘TiK ToK’ and you become vengeful again.)Want to know quite why you should hate Ke$ha?

1. It’s ‘Ke$ha’, not ‘Kesha

Look. It wasn’t cute or funny or daring when Prince decided to insert a symbol into his name, and it’s not here. For one thing, you can’t print that shit on a passport. For another, not everyone uses the dollar as a currency. Are we meant to convert the currency to different denominations when Ke$ha goes on her world tour? Does she become Ke(£0.62)ha when in the UK? What do we do when she gets converted into yen? They have THOUSANDS of yen to a dollar.

Ke$ha

2. She mangles song titles

As I said above, Tick Tock would be a logical song title. Not ‘TiK ToK’. Same with ‘We R Who We R’, ‘D.I.N.O.$.A.U.R’ (they didn’t have currency in the Jurassic age!) and a bunch of her other songs.

3. #DIEYOUNG

This is a role model to young women. She is currently trying to get the hashtag #DIEYOUNG trending on Twitter. I fear we’re going to have a spate of young suicides as people realise that she’s not just hawking her song and think that it’s some sort of moral code they should follow.

Ke$ha #DIEYOUNG

4. The happy dinosaur sound employee

Ke$ha was on BBC Radio 1 recently and revealed that as part of her entourage, she has someone whose sole job is to “make her happy when she’s sad”. Nevermind that thousands of starving orphans around the world don’t have food or company to help them in their depressing wallowing. Ke$ha needs someone to be happy. She asks that person to dress up in stupid clothes and make sounds like a baby T-rex to make her happier.

5. She earns a lot of money

She earns a lot of money and I don’t. That’s mainly where the bitterness comes from. Okay? Okay?!

Comments

  1. I love how you say #DIEYOUNG will promote youth suicide yet promoting hate with your titel is ok?

  2. This is the worst thing I’ve Ever read. How dare you

  3. You’re a terrible writer.

  4. I think u should shut the hell up! Ke$ha is amazing! She loves to have fun and she loves her fans! Ke$ha is my idol! K$ rules if u like ot not! Ke$ha is here to stay!

  5. The ‘$’ sign in ‘Ke$ha’ was because she was trying to be ironic. At the time, she was featured on Flo Rida’s ‘Right Round’ and she wouldn’t accept money for it even though she was poor. Like, living in a car, Buying canned vegetables at the dollar store poor.

  6. Ke$ha had the dollar sign to be ORIGINAL and so people would remember her it wasent about the currency and die young is a song there are heaps of other metal hard rock songs that make people commit suicide and everyone who is famous has a lot of money so your just trying to get attention writing this article!! who cares if she has the dollar sign in her name lots of artists have symbols in thier name!! Your just trying to hate on her and get others to but IT’S NOT WORKING!

  7. Die Young isn’t about committing suicide…its about making the most of life.

  8. Ke$ha is a talentless bimbo. Her unfortunate influence over young girls should worry mothers and fathers everywhere.

  9. ilovekesha says:

    what the fuck i really love kesha and who the fuck are you i really love kesha if your going to say things like that then shut the fuck up kesha is awesome and there is nothing wrong with her shes got an beautiful voice and shes an talent if u are saying stuff like that behind her back im going to kick you aase hole ya fucker kesha is really better then you kesha forever xxxxxxxx now leave kesha alone and do it on someone else NOW LEAVE!!!!!!

  10. I actually agree with you 100% . And I find your writing quite lovely , the hate is fab! She wears trashcans as clothing how gross. I could talk bad about her forever , anyway the people that like her are ignorant people

  11. i dont get why people keep idolizing people. Its pathetic…u idolize kesha..does she know u? Shes busy making m0ney and well i dont even wanna call her a singer… More of some0ne who just whines while a background music is being played.i mean, whats happening to the world now? People dont know what good music is! Great writeup..very witty!

  12. Anonymous. says:

    You’re all being ridiculous.
    The author of this is allowed to his/her opinion no matter how small minded it is. The only think wrong with this is the fact that point five is jealousy over money. It should have stopped at four, and the reasons the author “hates” her are a tad bit ridiculous, but it’s their opinion.
    I think she’s an interesting person. Like her or love her she gets a lot of attention and that’s what the author of this is doing. Even though it’s negative attention, it’s still attention and it’s what gives her fame. If you don’t like her don’t talk about her, it’s fairly simple actually. It’s a bit ridiculous that some of you think this will generate hate, because most of these people are going to argue with you and fight about it and nothing is going to resolve. Next thing you know some crazy person is gonna come on here and threaten whoever doesn’t agree with them.
    Now why don’t we all just stop being arrogant people, and look at things from others perspectives. Her music is not everyone’s cup of tea, just like how I personally can not stand Nicki Minaj, it’s just different for everyone. We’re not carbon copies of each another. Our interests vary, and instead of being jerks and telling someone their ignorant for liking a singer, how about we just accept the differences in music taste and end the arguing.

  13. Lol…
    just….Lol

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