It's hard to say what we love most about Tintin, but we've narrowed the list down to 1) Tintin's pugnacious character, 2) the gripping storylines or 3) the way Tintin was more horrifyingly racist than Jade Goody at a Bernard Manning convention.
But it's not just us who think that Tintin was racist – the whole world thinks that Tintin is a racist. And by 'the whole world' we clearly mean 'Borders the bookshop', since branches of Borders in both Britain and the US have chosen to remove copies of Tintin In The Congo from the Children's section and place them in the Books That Will Instantly Turn Your Children Into Red-Eyed Murderous Racists section after a recommendation from the Commission For Racial Equality. And there the copies of Tintin In The Congo will stay, at least the book is altered and republished as Tintin Mocks And Condescends Fatties, Spazzers, Gypsies And Other Slightly Less Offensive Targets For Abuse.
When it comes to ginger Belgian reporters with such a backwards social interaction skillset that they're required to perpetually be accompanied by a small dog for company, Tintin is probably in the top three or four of all time. However, just because you're ginger, went to the moon two decades before Neil Armstrong and saw a big mushroom on a beach once, it doesn't mean that you can't be so racist that parents regularly cover their childrens' ears and run away every time you express any of your dubious views, as Tintin is discovering for himself.
Theoretically, Tintin should be more popular than ever at the moment. As well as all the Tintin comic-books and Tintin TV shows, this year has also seen Tintin hit YouTube in a remarkably offensive way. But, best of all, Steven Spielberg and Peter Jackson are making a Tintin film together for 2009. So it's just rotten luck that Borders and the Commission For Racial Equality have just discovered that Tintin In The Congo, the second Tintin book and the one that features a rhino getting blown up with some dynamite and several scenes of stereotypical Africans talking about "juju", couldn't be any more racist if it was shaped like a crucifix, covered in petrol and screamed "White power!" when you opened it. Reuters reports:
Bookstore chain Borders said it has removed copies of a book about Belgian comics hero Tintin's adventures in Africa from the children's section of its U.S. stores, as well as British outlets, amid allegations of racism. The move comes about a week after British racism watchdog, the Commission for Racial Equality, recommended bookshops remove copies of "Tintin in the Congo." The CRE received a complaint from a member of the public who saw the book in a branch of Borders chain and urged Borders and all other bookshops to remove the "Congo" book, saying it made black people "look like monkeys and talk like imbeciles".
And, where Tintin In The Congo goes, we're half-expecting other Tintin books to follow. For instance, native Americans might be offended by their representation in Tintin In America, East Asians might be offended by their representation in The Blue Lotus and British people might be offended by their representation in The Black Islan… no, wait, British people can't read. Our mistake.
Of course, there'll be those who say that removing Tintin In The Congo from the Children's section of Borders is political correctness gone mad. And, to some extent, they'd be right. After all, things like this start with the sly recategorisation of books, but soon they'll be telling us we can't throw bricks at Moroccans or burn down synagogues. And then what?
Still, at least Michael Richards will be able to get his career back on track if he calls Steven Spielberg quickly enough.
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Rory says
I read Tintin as a child, and as a result I hate everyone.
BlissfulSissy09 says
I like reading your stuff… I’m addicted to amateur journalism no matter what people say!
nassy says
‘soon they’ll be telling us we can’t throw bricks at Moroccans’ haha im Moroccan but that’s hilarious!