…or so say Channel 4.

Never the sort of chaps to shy away from controversy, the Jimmy Carr Network has now decided to subject viewers to something of a ‘right royal romp’ (copyright – the impending Sun headlines).

In a film due to be broadcast in the autumn, the Queen’s late sister Princess Margaret – portrayed therein by actress Lucy Cohu – will apparently be ‘re-imagined’ (as remake-peddler Tim Burton would waffle) through a puke-smeared filter of "excesses of hedonism."

Cohu has taken a somewhat strange approach to her starring turn. ‘"I hope we don’t offend anybody," she mewled, "as I really like the Queen."

Okay. Two things have raised hecklerspray’s eyebrows a little here.

First up – who "really likes" the Queen? Who is a ‘fan’ of the Sovereign? What sort of appreciative gushing would it even be possible to come up when confronted with Her Madge? "Hey, Liz, I really like the way you raise your hand every now and then. Oh, and that semi-constipated expression you keep plastered on your face at every available opportunity is a real winner!"

Secondly – if you’ve really got your heart set on not offending somebody, surely the best way is not to depict that person’s dead sister giving oral sex, fumbling around in a lesbian clinch, shovelling down drugs like candy and indulging in all sorts of naughtiness.

Not that hecklerspray cares.

It’s not that we’re Anti-Monarchy or anything. Just that we think they should all be dragged through the centre of every UK city, naked, quivering and smeared in shit, before being thrown into the nearest Kwik-Save and told to work there for the rest of their pointless lives, while all the time Burberry-clad rat children hurl empty Bacardi Breezer bottles at them and film it all on their mobile phones.

For ever and ever amen.

Come to mention it, we’re actually trying to get our own mini-series off the ground: Diana – She Was A Bit Of A Twat Really. Alternative title: Diana – She Wanted To Star In Kevin Costner’s ‘The Bodyguard’ (do a Google search). Featuring Paris Hilton as The Sloane Ranger herself. And Graham Norton as Paul Burrell.

Haven’t had much interest yet, mind.

Read More:

Princess Drama Set To Raise Hackles – Yahoo News

[story by C J Davies]