Prepare To Need Therapy After Watching Tan Mom’s Music Video

tanning momLennon. Dylan. Hendrix. Bowie. These are just some of the musical legends that ‘Tanning Mom’ Patricia Krentcil is reminiscent of in her debut music video.

A video so deep that it speaks to the viewer on a personal level, moving them to see the world around them in a new light. A melody so haunting, so beautiful, that it could make even the hardest man shed a tear.

Just kidding. Although if you’re a fan of Windows Movie Maker, ‘The Robot’, and middle aged women in bikinis being groped  behind the presidential podium, then you are in for a treat, my friend.

Patricia became that special kind of ‘internet famous’ for having a face the colour of Dorito dust and wanting her five year old daughter to match. That’s her hook, that’s literally all people recognise her for.

Which is why it makes precisely zero sense for her to be parading round all (relatively) milky white in her music video entitled “It’s Tan Mom”. It should really just be called “It’s Mom”, and if that was the case then it really shouldn’t exist at all.

‘Rightful Pigment Mom’ spends the video awkwardly grinding against young backing dancers in tight boxer shorts, slurring about how you can’t judge her. Hey,wanna bet? No word on if she wrote the track herself, but we may be looking at the next Bon Iver  if such touching lyrics as these are anything to go by:

I’m sexier than the Teen Mom / I am cool / I’m the cool one / I’m hotter than the Octo-Mom

Skip to around the 2.00 mark to watch her completely drop any resemblance of singing and stick her tongue down the ear of an Adam Lambert look-a-like who delivers an incoherent half-rap whilst stood in front of what is meant to be the president’s podium.

This might leave YouTube stars in quite a jam – how can you parody something this awful without accidentally making it better?


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  1. Natasha says

    Nice to see that Jim Carry is bringing back his Venus from Living Color back. He still looks pretty good dressed like a girl!. Oh, that was The Real One? Sorry Jim.