Postcards From Stu On Vacation, #2: Stu Gets His Stomach Banded

Word from Stu on vacation is like a sweet breeze in the broad expanse of a desert. It’s like finally dancing before the king after literally years of practice and anticipation. It’s like pooping when you really had to go.

And in this we are lucky, for today we have heard from him again. Todays post tells of his adventures in a gastric bypass surgery center somewhere off the coast of Whales:

Dearest Readers,

I’m gonna be skinny! I’m gonna be skinny! I’m gonna be skinny! I’m gonna be skinny !I’m gonna be skinny! I’m gonna be skinny! I’m gonna be skinny! I’m gonna be skinny! I’m gonna be skinny! I’m gonna be skinny! I’m gonna be…….

Yours in editing,

Stu

He actually went on like that over the whole front and back. We’ve just spared you quite a bit of useless reading you know. But oh that’s wonderful news for Stu! Well we’ll be dusting off those Jordache jeans you’ve been keeping since the tenth grade - and we’ll have them proudly displayed at the airport when you arrive.

Wonderful news! Huzzah for Stu!