All this talk of a terminal box office slide has been made to look just a little bit silly this weekend, and all it took was Edward Scissorhands acting a bit gay; Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest is the number one US weekend box office movie – ever.
That's right, Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest has already taken $132 million – more weekend box office money than anything other film in history, beating Spiderman, Star Wars, Shrek and Legally Blonde 2: Red, White And Blonde. This is quite a feat, and we're fully expecting that you're finding it as hard as we are to believe that Miles out of This Life is a proper film star these days.
Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest isn't just sitting at the top of the US weekend box office chart for this week; Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest is sitting at the top of the US weekend box office all-time chart. Obviously this means that moviegoers have finally been won over by the wooden acting and incessant joyless mugging of Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest stars Keira Knightley and Orlando Bloom. Well, either that or they just want to see Johnny Depp do that funny running thing again. Who knows? Here's the US weekend box office top five…
1 – Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest (We've seen a few movie trilogies now, so we're confident that the Pirates Of The Caribbean saga will end next year with either Johnny Depp, blinded by having an electrical cable thrust into his eyes, fights of waves and waves of enemy robots, or Johnny Depp and Orlando Bloom turning their ship into a time machine and travelling back to the Wild West for a high-fallutin' adventure) $132,028,000
2 – Superman Returns (During promotion for Superman Returns, Superman was described as The World's Greatest Immigrant. Makosi out of Big Brother must be pissed off, since that title used to belong to her) $21,850,000
3 – The Devil Wears Prada (Still hanging in the US weekend box office top five, even though watching two hours of women being snippy at each other sounds about as thrilling as puncturing your windpipe with a rusty pipe) $15,600,000
4 – Click (This week, Adam Sandler uses his magic remote control to pause Kate Beckinsdale mid-conversation and look down her top. Just like you would, you filthy bugger) $12,000,000
5 – Cars (The film that answers the eternal question "What would happen if cars grew frightening big faces and talked to each other with Owen Wilson's voice?") $10,330,000
[story by Stuart Heritage]