Piers Morgan, the ever lovable former Daily Mirror editor and man for whom the word smarmy was invented, certainly has gotten his large, soiled knickers in a twist of late.
we're not even half way through the week and he's already attempted to take some cheap shots at 2 people who are infinitely more famous and loved than him.
It's the equivalent of the school weed slagging off the popular kids because they won't invite him to their fancy pool parties when their parents go to Tuscany for the weekend.
On Monday, Morgan went on Chelsea Lately, one of the billions of late night talk shows more popular than his own in the States, to have a pop at Madonna, claiming that the baby catcher?s Super Bowl performance was akin to that of, ?a gruesome drunken Aunt.?
TAKE THAT MADONNA! You just got served. Piers Morgan, a man who will struggle to get the same amount of viewers all year that you got during your brief Super Bowl half-time show, just told you how it went down!
Why don't you start acting your age and visit a W.I. meeting once in a while, huh!?
After dispatching of her Madgesty, Piers pointed his pistol of perfunctory towards former footballer, Match of the Day presenter and UN ambassador for crisps, Gary Lineker.
Morgan decided to brag to the former Spurs star about a review he got in the San Fransisco Chronicle, praising his talents as a football pundit on Fox TV. Lineker went on to question how long Morgan had spent searching for that, lone, positive review, to which Morgan replied, one can only assume with a look of post-mastubatory smugness plastered across his sweaty brow:
“I currently air in 200 countries/territories – how you getting on? #SmallPondMinnow”
Despite forgetting to mention that even though he's aired in 200 territories, he still only draws a crowd of about 6, Morgan mopped the mix of bile and man lather from his keyboard and went to make a cup of tea, safe in the knowledge that he'd given Gary Lineker, ?a Madonna.?
But our Gary isn't Madonna, he doesn't take things lying down, or from Malawi, he rebutted Morgan?s smugspunk with this:
“I think the 2 world cups I played in probably edged that.?
BAM! He had Morgan on the ropes, but wasn?t finished yet, fearing Morgan could possibly steal his presenting gig, Salt and Lineker wound up and struck the final, devastating blow to Morgan?s inflated ego:
“Spoke to the powers that be at the BBC and they are very interested in you… staying in America”
He may work for Walkers, but Lineker is definitely the Real McCoy.
Sorry.
Makethisworkout says
i live abroad thus know alot of Americans who don’t know this scum’s past – he’s quite popular over there
Adam Smith says
Concerning Piers Morgan: CNN should read the book by Harvard Business School lecturer Robert Sutton – “The No Arsehole Rule”. The message is “do not hire arseholes” they are bad for business.