We don't know about you, but we love it when a reality TV contestant – who everyone has known would win since the first day – turns his winning interview into an incomprehensible rant about heaven and hell and spirals and stuff.
That's the case with Pete Bennett, the 24-year-old Tourette's sufferer who briefly turned "Meow! Wankers!" into this year's "Wazzzzup" – Pete won Big Brother 7 on Friday night. And now that Big Brother is over, all we have to look forward to are the petrified faces of Richard and Judy as they try to guide Pete through a swearless interview on live TV.
Feels strange that Big Brother has ended, doesn't it? No more Big Brother, no more silent live Big Brother feeds on E4, no more Dermot O'Leary trying not to look like the worst kind of teenage girl psychologist on Big Brother's Big Brain, no more Russell Brand telling the same jokes word for word every night on Big Brother's Big Mouth and no more watching really really edited diary room entries on the bewilderingly titled Big Brother Diary Room Uncut. What should you do with all this free time you'll have now there's no more Big Brother to watch? We're still deciding between signing up to do some charity work and sitting around on our sofa slagging off all the old Big Brother housemates for still wanting to be famous.
But anyway, on Friday night Pete Bennett did exactly what everyone had known from within the first ten minutes of Big Brother – he won. Not that it was a particularly hard choice for anyone to make, since the other Big Brother housemates were made up variously of a prostitute, a professional porn star, a homemade porn star, a middle-aged stripper, a big-armed burper out on a permanent hen night, a bright orange transsexual, the shittest sexual terrorist in the world, a deranged rapper, a suspected rapist, two dull scousers, a fame-hungry posho with a face like Pob, a man with a toy cat instead of a personality and Glyn.
And right from the outset, Friday's Big Brother was always going to be about Pete Bennett (or Pete FromBigBrother, as he'd better get used to being called). Throughout the live eviction show, the crowd hollered and cheered every time Pete's gurning face was flashed up on the screen like he was the returning messiah instead of a slightly pointless hippy, and the whole show was obviously gearing up for a Pete victory from the outset. Of the other five Big Brother evictions that took place on Friday, only Nikki's is worth mentioning – she was confusingly booed by the same people who'd spent £150,000 a few weeks before to get her back into the Big Brother house, burst into tears, refused to take part in a real interview and then was told that she'd been so rubbish in the Big Brother house that she wasn't even going to get a 'Best Bits' package. And that was the closest to TV gold that the evening threw up.
Because Pete actually winning Big Brother was a damp squib of vast proportions. Big Brother has yet to top the sequence of events from the first series, when Craig gave his winning cheque to a disabled girl so she could get a life-saving operation. Pete did his best to match this, leaving the house in the style of a WWF wrestler and then telling Davina that Big Brother had all but saved his life:
"Last year I went mad, a bit bananas. I was completely, absolutely at the end of my tether in life, and all that. I had a huge visit from my mate in heaven. He came down and he showed me a huge spiral. Where I was, was hell. He showed me the only way to remember who I was, was to go up the spiral and on the way I had got to go into Big Brother and win and that's the only way."
However, Pete only really succeeded in making himself look like more of a ketamine-soaked ninny than we all already thought he was. But still, Pete Bennett is the winner of Big Brother now, and it's thanks to all your votes. Just don't come running to us when you're sick of Daddy Fantastic.
Read more:
Long-Time Favourite Pete Wins Big Brother – Reuters
[story by Stuart Heritage]
leanne says
I LOVE YOU
I HOPE U CUM ROUND MY HOUSE I LOVE YOUR PERSONALITY U SEXY THIN
STEVIE says
i dont like him as much