It's getting more and more difficult to be a paparazzi these days. There's the increasing hostility of the celebrities, and an always growing amount of anti-sentiment from the general public. In a horrible way, it almost makes sense that a papo would eventually snap and attempt to murder Cameron Diaz and Justin Timberlake with a multi-ton automobile. Allegedly.
It's OK though, he missed. We're told that Justin Timberlake's car-evasion tactic was particularly tight – it's said to have included a wicked awesome backflip and a touch of moon-walking. Cameron Diaz escaped by wrapping her growing face wrinkles around an overhanging tree branch, and pulling herself up.
Take that Hollywood script-writers.
Paparazzi have it rough, don't they? When they're not getting arrested for maliciously stalking Brangelina's kids, they're showing up dead a little after hitting a kid in the head with a camera at a Reese Witherspoon birthday party. When they're not getting verbally ravaged by Ben Affleck, they're making Paris Hilton smack into parked cars.
And when they try to sneak pictures of the celebrity couple Cameron Diaz and Justin Timberlake, they get violently chased by the pair – which is exactly what happened here. The Paparazzo jumped out of a bush to take their picture and booked it to his car when they didn't take it so well. He reportedly hopped in and floored it in the general direction of the panting lovers still standing in the street. Diaz claims to have had to jump out of the way in the name of not-dying. Cameron Diaz later reported the incident to the police, who paraphrased the situation like this:
"Cameron was the victim of a possible assault with a deadly weapon. The deadly weapon was the car that the photographer was driving."
No suspects have yet been named, but a photo agency has, and that agency's version of the incident is much different:
"To the best of our knowledge, the pictures and video of Justin Timberlake and Cameron Diaz early morning on Tuesday, September 19 were taken on a public street where there was no 'Private Drive' or 'Private Property' sign visible. What the photographer knows he saw and what the pictures show, were at least two people verbally and physically assaulting him. Reports stating that Ms. Diaz has told police that the photographer tried to run her over with his car are completely false. The photographer was attempting to leave what he perceived to be a dangerous situation for him and when he tried to do so, Ms. Diaz and at least one other member of her entourage stood in front of his car in an attempt to entrap him. He drove around them at what he perceived to be a safe distance, as at least five members of Ms. Diaz and Mr. Timberlake's group were yelling at him, making threats against him. The photographer is currently in the process of filing a complaint against Ms. Diaz and Mr. Timberlake."
Well hecklerspray would really like to know what would have happened if the love-birds had caught their quarry. Maybe they'd have given him a severe tongue-lashing or a disappointed glare or – worse yet – maybe they'd sit him down and shatter his balls with liquid nitrogen and a plugged-in jackhammer.
Ooh yeah, that'd learn him good.
Read more:
Cameron & Justin Call Cops On Paparazzo – E! Online
[story by Shawn Lindseth]