Every female on the planet pretty much wants to be Pamela Anderson, since they're all jealous of her galactic pretend knockers, her love for some animals and her ability to star in career-wrecking movies like Barb Wire.

But those women certainly aren't jealous of Pamela Anderson's love life, since it seems to contain long dry spells punctuated by either bunk-ups with blokes holding camcorders or bunk-ups with that twat from T4. Now, though, the dry spell is over - Pamela Anderson has found love with Kid Rock. Yes, just like she did four years ago. Anyway, long story short: Pamela Anderson is getting married to Kid Rock soon, and she's written about it all over the Internet.

We've all been there - as a relationship with a loved one ends, it's only natural to look back on the events which got you where you are today, analyse what went wrong and focus on doing something worthwhile with your life, like dedicating your life to charity. That's what Pamela Anderson has been doing - barely a week goes by without hearing about Pamela Anderson complaining about KFC or complaining about Canadian seals getting culled. And it's beautiful to see one of the world's most glamourous women commit herself so fully to a worthy cause. Sometimes, though, events change and you think "screw charity - I'm in love with a redneck!"

Pamela Anderson and Kid Rock go way back - way back to 2002, when Pamela Anderson was known as the star of a couple of proto Paris Hilton internet sex tapes and Kid Rock was… well, we've never worked out why Kid Rock is famous. Anyway, in 2002, Pamela Anderson and Kid Rock got engaged, but things didn't end happily - they split up a year later. And while Pamela Anderson appropriated herself with PETA, Kid Rock went off and got in a bit of trouble over his own sex tape. 

Now, though, fate has pushed Pamela Anderson and Kid Rock back together, as yesterday's diary entry on Pamela Anderson's website revealed:

"Yes. I'm finally getting remarried… it's been a whirlwind… spontaneous but well thought through. Feels like I've been stuck in a time warp. Not able to let go of MY family picture… it's been sad and lonely and frustrating…. I've raised my kids alone in hope of a miracle. Well my miracle came and went. And came back and came back because he knew that I'd wake up one day and realize that I was waiting for nothing. I'm moving on… I feel like I'm finally free…. I'm in love. I'm happy…. I see the light… sounds dramatic but it's true."

Browsing Pamela Anderson's diary also revealed that she supported England during the World Cup, which says a lot about how she likes to attach herself to losers. Anyway, the diary entry isn't a weird unexplained splurge of insecurity - we hear Britney Spears has the patent for those - since it's been officially confirmed by Pamela's spokesperson: 

"They've been close for a very long time and decided that now is the right time to take the next step. They couldn't be happier about their future together."

So congratulations to Pamela Anderson and Kid Rock, and commiserations to that T4 bloke, who has one less thing to be a little bit less insufferably smug on telly at the weekend about.

Read more:

Kid Rock, Pam Anderson To Wed - ABC

[story by Stuart Heritage]