Creased or Folded? hecklerspray Tells You the Way it is

by Chris Laverty

This week’s filthy likes and dislikes. Folded: Scott Mills (annoying as you like on the radio, but fair play to him for making that difficult The World’s Worst Place to Be Gay? programme. Slapped repeatedly with a chicken for goodness sake) National Express’ profits are up nearly 40% (great news for them, though undoubtedly means [...]

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HecklerPlay: Introducing The Digital Music Awards

by Matthew Laidlow

Even though it’s only February, we’ve already been treated to a couple of music awards. Within the space of forty eight hours, we’d seen our American chums dish out awards at The Grammys and back in more homely surrounds, London’s O2 arena was used to host The Brit Awards. Asides from different hosts and performances, [...]

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Katie Price Likes Brains And Murderers And Has Bonus Round With Alex Reid

by Mof Gimmers

Katie Price aka Jordan is bloody brilliant. Not only is she covered in boobs, has cloven hoofs and a slightly large orange head, she also has a great big gaping hole in the front of her face and sometimes words fly out of it like a perfectly veneered bat cave. Of course, like any devoted [...]

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Rihanna To Star In Remake Of The Bodyguard? Universe Weeps In Preparation

by Mof Gimmers

Remember the first time you watched The Bodyguard? It felt like it was 37 hours long didn’t it? Still, nowhere near as long as the hideous ‘I Will Always Love YooooooOOOoOoOOOUuu’ haunted our pop charts. As an aside, have you ever noticed that Whitney Houston looks like she’s having an alfresco dump as the key-change [...]

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Bid For Justin Bieber’s Bonce On Ebay

by Kris Silver

Squeaky clean pop annoyance Justin Bieber recently had a haircut, which was front-page news almost everywhere, even here on hecklerspray. The news of his haircut sent shockwaves around the world, with sexually confused 12 year olds and slightly creepy 40 somethings everywhere begging to know why he’d chopped his famous $500 fringe off. Naturally it’s [...]

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David Arquette Thought Courteney Cox Was Having An Affair But He’s Mental

by Mof Gimmers

David Arquette, a man who could be seen hanging out of the back of a nubile young waitress before he’d even started divorce proceedings with Courteney ‘Too Many Es In Her First Name’ Cox, is a simpleton. Every time he appears, with his face that is simultaneously aged and like that of a baby, he [...]

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Charlie Sheen Calls His Boss A Maggot And Goes Brilliantly Mental On The Radio

by Mof Gimmers

Charlie Sheen is the king of Hollywood. If he isn’t, we are certainly enjoying the way he’s strutting around like he owns the place. The man is a glorious law unto himself. And after what seems like a really fun month or so, he’s got all nasty and snarly like a tired, drunk old Doberman. [...]

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Lily Allen Gets Angry As Kanye West Tactfully Discusses Abortion On Twitter

by Mof Gimmers

You could argue that, for the most part, Kanye West is an entertaining and spirited chap. That’s usually because he has an astonishing inability to self-censor. He opens up that expensive mouth of his and BLAM it all comes tumbling out like word-shaped puke. Of course, his most famous bout of vomitous babbling was during [...]

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Muse Get Beaten By Susan Boyle In International Sales, The Failures

by Matthew Laidlow

From the bulging mailbags and comments we receive, it appears the three blokes and Matt Bellamy who make up Muse are the greatest band in the world. In terms that even a simpleton could understand, Muse are like the Jesus H. Christ of music. Everything they belt out is phenomenal and lapped up by their [...]

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Posh Spice Says She’s Not Angelina Jolie And The Whole World Says ‘Duh’

by hecklerspray staff

Once upon a time there was a girl who couldn’t sing. Llike all good fame hungry, fake tanned dunderheads, she joined a silly band with other girls who also sang in the key of ‘pish’, married a footballer and stopped eating until she was built like the side of a five pound note. Then while [...]

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