Ten Songs Paul McCartney Should Consider For Olympic Opening Ceremony

by Mof Gimmers

Paul McCartney is all set to headline the opening ceremony of London 2012 Olympic Games alongside other British music stars who probably aren’t nearly as good. Unless they get Girls Aloud on which would be amazing. The Beatle has told organisers of London 2012 he is “up for” playing at the opener, but which songs [...]

7 comments Read more >>>

Brad Pitt’s Arm Having Affair With Woman’s Hand Shock!

by Paul Pencott

Angelina Jolie is believed to be going spastic at recent reports that Brad Pitt might be having “a bit laugh and carry on” with a mystery woman on the set of his new film. However, these ‘beliefs’ and ‘reports’ are coming from a turgid UK rag owned by pornography-king Richard Desmond, and there seems to [...]

3 comments Read more >>>

Katie Price Loves Harold Shipman & Wrote A Book But She’s Never Said Anything Purely For Publicity’s Sake

by Sophie Hall

You really think you have the energy to hear this? Sure about that, are we? Let’s just take this slow, just in case. Let’s not get lodged inside something dark and unyielding and then regret it afterwards (Extract from Antony Costa’s Bedroom Memoirs, 2008) So. Katie Price has written another book. You should know the [...]

0 comments Read more >>>

Cher Lloyd Ignores Her Stylists Because They, Like Everyone Else, Are Haters

by Michael Park

It is a fact, passed down through from hecklerspray writer to hecklerspray writer that if ever someone utters the words “haters gonna hate” or any other variation on that theme that they have automatically marked themselves out as a hateful figure. Therefore it is easy to imagine the vehement feelings of anger that course through [...]

0 comments Read more >>>

Tom Hardy Thinks The Dark Knight Rises Is Like Starbucks (Tasteless?)

by Mof Gimmers

Tom Hardy, a man of no fixed accent, is of course playing a nasty villain called Bane in Christopher Nolan’s upcoming Batman circle jerk, The Dark Knight Rises. You’d think he was pretty pleased at this well paying gig, right? Well, not wholly. See, it seems that Hardy is looking lovingly at some indie roles [...]

20 comments Read more >>>

WEBTHUMP! 27 July 2011

by Mof Gimmers

10. MF Doom and Wu Tang’s Ghostface team up for tunes and a tour of the UK?! Yes please! – Supa 9. A really great little animation that does puberty in one minute. 8. Quite simply the most astonishing news story you’ll ever, ever read. – WOW 10. MF Doom and Wu Tang’s Ghostface team [...]

0 comments Read more >>>

Arnold Schwarzenegger May Have Had A Vague Idea That Everyone Thinks He’s A Rotten Swine

by Mof Gimmers

Rumours of being a little bit gropey, a secret love baby with the house maid, a Republican and a man who didn’t want to give his wife any divorce money. Yep. Arnold Schwarzenegger has been a prize bell-end over the years, especially so in recent months. It’s concerning the divorce pennies that has seen Arnie [...]

13 comments Read more >>>

Blake Fielder-Civil Could’ve Save Amy Winehouse If He Hadn’t Helped Her Take All Those Drugs

by Mof Gimmers

Amy Winehouse’s death was felt sincerely by many, including her ex-husband, Blake Fielder-Civil. He’s riddled with anguish, invariably soundtracked by a chorus of boos from those who need someone to blame for Winehouse’s troubles. However, Blake believes he could have saved Amy. Get ready to launch your rotten tomatoes and insults because, we’re imagining you’ve [...]

0 comments Read more >>>

Crystal Harris Never Saw Hugh Hefner Naked (So Let Us Show You Then)

by Mof Gimmers

We were all pretty shocked when Crystal Harris decided to ditch Playboy founder, Hugh Hefner, just days before she was due to walk up the altar. They seemed like such a lovely couple. Perfect for each other in fact! Alas, it wasn’t to be and us mere mortals were denied the greatest love story ever [...]

2 comments Read more >>>

Nicki Minaj Fined Hilarious Amount For Potty Mouthed Appearance

by Mof Gimmers

Despite the music industry being in some kind of financial crisis, it doesn’t stop certain artists from flaunting their gargantuan wealth and having wardrobes that are more expensive than absolutely everything in Ireland and Greece combined. And so, when we need to make an example of them, we try and throw the book at them [...]

0 comments Read more >>>

← Previous Entries

Next Entries →