There is nothing I love than more than when two sexy celebs who I find pretty delightful get linked together, however, I’m not really sure how I feel about this one. The newest “couple” to get the rumour mill a turning is Selena Gomez and Orlando Bloom, and it’s kind of like watching your creepy older cousin hit on the little girl you used to babysit.
Maybe it’s because I’ve been watching Selena on television since she was pretty young, but when I look at this picture of them together I can’t help but think “Someone tell Orlando Bloom to stop smoking around that child! Where are her parents!?” The above picture seriously looks like an after school special.
Orlando Bloom looks like a grown man in his late-30s (which he is), while Selena could still pass for a middle school student, so maybe that’s why I find this so weird. However, the reason they might be canoodling is even fucking weirder.
Reliable sources (aka TMZ) are alleging that the two may be revenge screwing. Revenge, you ask? What revenge? Well, in case you forgot, cheating rumours swirled around Miranda Kerr in 2012, claiming she cheated on Orlando with Justin Bieber, who was with Selena at the time, because apparently Miranda Kerr is fucking INSANE.
Miranda was always very flirty with Justin, and they exchanged dirty texts. Orlando heard that there had been some flirting going on and he wasn’t exactly thrilled about it.
A grown, beautiful woman with a child sending sexy texts to Justin Bieber? I just threw up in my mouth.
Anyway, as happy as I am that this might mean that Selena is finally moving on from Biebs, I can’t see how this relationship could possibly work. He’s the father of a toddler while she just stopped dating a cranky toddler who always wants to stay up past his bedtime. So, revenge screw away, you guys, but I wouldn’t expect much to come from it (except maybe Orlando a few times. BAM!)