Oprah Winfrey Still Insanely Bloody Rich

Warning - by the time you've finished reading this article, Oprah Winfrey will have earned close to one thousand dollars; oh, and last night while you were sleeping Oprah Winfrey earned $237,000 too.

This is because Oprah Winfrey is the richest person in television at the moment, with Forbes estimating that Oprah earned $260 million last year alone, quadruple the amount of her next-placed rival. But while an annual salary of $260 million is a lot of money, it's worth remember that… oh, who are we kidding, $260 million a year is a shitload of money regardless of anything. And Oprah's vast wealth has led us to believe that we're in the wrong business - which is why, as of tomorrow, we're replacing pithy celebrity news with a pretend sincere discussion with some idiots about divorce and an interview with a filmstar so sycophantic we'll have to scrub our vomit-stained bodies clean with wire wool afterwards. We're coming for your cash, Oprah. 

Yes, we know. Rich Person Still Rich isn't much of a story. But look at the amount of money that Oprah Winfrey earns these days - remember that whenever you pick up your payslip at the end of each month, however much it's for, Oprah Winfrey picks up one for $21.6 million. That means that while you're sat at home worrying that you won't be able to eat if you buy a new toaster, Oprah Winfrey could theoretically hire Heston Blumenthal to hand-make personalised batches of ruby-flavoured bread and fly it to the sun on diamond-covered rocketships until it was perfectly toasted. Or something. We're pretty sure we read about it in O Magazine once.

Forbes magazine has published its TV 20 list, to try and discover the highest-paid stars in American television. And, as it turns out, the highest-paid star in American wasn't hard to find because it was Oprah Winfrey, a woman with earnings larger than the nominal GDP of Tonga and four times the amount of her next-placed rival. ABC reports:

Financial magazine Forbes on Thursday published a list of the highest-paid TV celebrities, with daytime talk show host Oprah Winfrey leading the way by earning an $260 million between June 2006 and June 2007. Nobody else came close. Second in the list was Jerry Seinfeld earning $60 million. Winfrey was joined at the top of the list by another talk show host, David Letterman, who landed at No. 4 by raking in $40 million in the same period from his "Late Night with David Letterman."

Third in the Forbes TV 20, in case you were wondering, was Simon Cowell, who would have presumably done better if he'd have only thought to launch a magazine about himself, a home-based magazine about himself, a radio station about himself, an online store and a handful of unfounded persistent gay rumours. So at least he's getting there.

But you can't say that Oprah Winfrey doesn't use her wealth for good. Don't forget that Oprah Winfrey is constantly building new schools for Africans and handing out charity credit cards, which at least goes some way to making up for how she also sues people who want her to be President or gets upset when her Dad tries to write books about her. And, anyway, it's important to remember that money - not even $260 million a year - can buy you happiness. But it can buy you a massive yacht with a helicopter pad on the deck which, in turn, will probably make you quite happy.

Read more:

Oprah's Big Talk = Bigger Bucks - ABC