OJ Simpson Takes A Stab At Next Celebrity Apprentice

The only reality show we want to see Donald Trump star in is one where he and Rosie O’Donnell are trapped for a week in a commercial elevator together, with nothing but multiple wet, sticky lollipops covering their privies.

Also there’d be live sugar-craving geese in there with them – pecking away at unspecified things.

That show would be great indeed – and we’d watch it too. It’s a tragedy then, that it will never get made. Because in the next Celebrity Apprentice, D. Trump will come face to face with a murderer! We meant with an accused murderer! And might be killed himself! But probably not!

Keep in mind that nothing’s been finalised, but rumor has it that OJ Simpson wants him a slice of Apprentice.

Somebody re-word that last bit.

The best part about OJ Simpson wanting to take part in Donald Trump’s next Apprentice season is that we get to tell the murder jokes we’ve been dying to pass on! What’s that? We didn’t hear you because we had something in our throat and we were coffin! We’d better end this story soon because we currently find ourselves in the unfortunate circumstance of… getting stabbed!

Now let’s just hold on a minute.

This is getting out of hand. Why don’t we just turn things over to The NY Post:

It looks like there could be “killer” ratings in store for TV’s “The Celebrity Apprentice” if OJ Simpson gets his way. Page Six has learned the creepy double-murder acquittee has asked Donald Trump to allow him to appear on the top-rated NBC show next season. “Simpson really wants to do it. Trump and NBC are thinking about it, but are being very cautious,” our source said. “There’s a certain amount of heat associated with Simpson.”

We’ve heard Simpson was able to get his audience with Trump by waiting under his bed all day until he came home. If a deal is made, ratings will probably soar and Trump will get all his children back. We don’t remember where we heard that, but we swear its almost completely true. By some standard.

We think a reality Trump/Simpson combo is a pretty good idea, although The Apprentice may be the wrong platform. Trump’s newer idea though – where he wants to teach Spitzer’s slut-bag manners, that’s the one we really want to see Simpson in. He could be the guy that teaches her proper table etiquette – like knife handling.

Honestly, we could go on all day. Now what if Simpson was on that show, but instead of teaching – he learns. Trump has experts teaching Simpson lessons. It could be like a rehab thing. Season 2 could have Ted Kaczyinski and #3 could be the Olympic Park bomber. Or the bear he wrestled.

See, now we’re getting somewhere.

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Source: O.J. Simpson Wants to Be on ‘The Apprentice’ - Fox News