If I Did It, the book where OJ Simpson imagines what it would be like to kill those two people he didn’t kill with proceeds going to the family of one of the people he imagines killing, was finally published yesterday.

And it was a happy day for everybody involved in the If I Did It process. Well, for everyone except for Judith Regan who got fired for commissioning the book, OJ Simpson whose reputation has sunk to a brand-new low, the Goldman family who are essentially profiting from their son’s murder and Denise Brown who’s furious that If I Did It was even published in the first place. By our estimations, that leaves the guy who designed the cover of If I Did It but, hey, he did a bang-up job so we’re sure it was a happy day for him. Anyway, there’s only one way to sort this sorry mess of a scenario out – and that’s with the healing power of Oprah Winfrey.