Britney Spears has been out of rehab for a little while now, and she's slowly starting to readjust to a normal routine at a normal rhythm, doing normal things like smashing up her teeth and creating normal amounts of frantic paparazzi activity for it.

The paparazzi are now coiled so tightly on the off-chance that Britney Spears is going to do something very stupid to herself now she's no longer in rehab that even something as innocuous and Britney Spears breaking a tooth and going to the dentist was warped out of all recognition by the excitable flurry of paparazzi noise. Britney Spears is in ER, the rumours went, or Britney Spears has taken an overdose. In actual fact Britney Spears had just hurt herself in her mouth a bit. But that's still more or less interesting enough to warrant us telling you about it, right? Hello?

Britney Spears is not like you, unless of course you have your own statue of a baby crawling out of your minge and have spent a lot of time actively scaring the Japanese – in which case Britney Spears is a little bit like you – but let's assume that's not the case. Britney Spears is not like you because of the way you go to the dentist. When you go to the dentist, chances are you sit in a slightly dingy waiting room reading issues of Bella from 1993 before an old man spends 12 seconds looking at your teeth and then charges you a week's wages for the pleasure. Not Britney Spears, though. When Britney Spears goes to the dentist, the world's media think it's because she's killed herself.

That's not too much of a leap for anyone to make, though – during her recent stay in rehab Britney Spears killed time between falling in love with guitarists in shit bands and forcing Kevin Federline to shave his head by apparently attempting suicide while declaring herself to be the Antichrist – but unless Britney Spears tried to kill herself this time by chewing on some unusually hard toffee, it looks like all the commotion was for nothing. E Canada Now reports:

Britney Spears was admitted to hospital for a broken tooth yesterday evening (25.03.07). The ‘Toxic’ singer seemed to be in considerable pain, though she smiled and laughed for the cameras as she entered Century City Medical Plaza. A source said: “She was smiling for the cameras, but the moment she got into the elevators she was complaining to her bodyguards that it was unfair her tooth was broken, and she couldn’t take painkillers.” Britney’s representative Larry Rudlolph said: “Reports Britney was hospitalised are all wrong. She just went to the dentist. She had a toothache. I have no more details.” The 25-year-old star was treated by a dentist and left the hospital about an hour later.

And who are we to disbelieve Britney's slaves? We're sure that the handfuls of prescription medicine that Britney Spears was no doubt given were for her teeth alone and not, as other sources have insinuated, to satisfy her chronic wild-eyed post-rehab craving for drugs of any kind.

But at least this is good news for anyone who collects stories about parts of Britney Spears going wrong. So far in recent months Britney Spears' hair has had it, Britney Spears' vagina has had it, Britney Spears' puke-duct has had it and possibly Britney Spears' brain has had it – and now Britney Spears' teeth have had it too. We don't know about you, but if we were Britney Spears' armpits we'd be shitting it at the moment. 

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Britney Spears makes Emergency Visit To The Dentist – E Canada Now