Titling a blog “We Need to Talk About Kim Kardashian’s Ass” seems a bit trite at this point, I know, but this is actually a totally different type of blog from my previous Kim’s ass blogs, I promise you.
Kim is currently on vacation with her girlfriend’s for sister Kourtney’s 38th birthday, and paparazzi pics have been released that have clearly not been photoshopped because Kim’s ass looks nothing like the ass we are used to, and people are freaking out.
For a few years now, people have been speculating that the Kardashian/Jenner clan has a personal paparazzi team on their payroll, and this team will edit and photoshop any and all “candid” photos of them before selling them to tabloids, magazines, etc. This might seem far-fetched, but it would certainly explain why they look a really specific way in some “candid” shots, yet totally different in, say, TMZ videos or whatever. You see, so far this year, this is what a totally candid “paparazzi” shot of Kim in a swimsuit looked like:
And this is what came out this week:
I know, I know.
People are freaking out for a couple of reasons. First of all, Kim’s ass looks really bad. Not bad in the sense that “Oh, she has cellulite”, because 80-90% of women have cellulite, that’s a fucking thing; I mean bad in the sense it looks like she’s had some horrific butt injections that have gone bad a la Iggy Azalea:
Second, this is kind of like official proof that for years Kim Kardashian has been paying off paps to photoshop her pics and now it’s like we’re all seeing her for the first time.
I find this whole thing a bit annoying because Kim Kardashian legitimately promotes an image that’s even unobtainable to her. She’s spent a fortune on cosmetic procedures, but then photoshops the living hell out of her own pictures, and pays the PAPARAZZI to photoshop the hell out of pictures of her so the world has no idea what she even fucking looks like anymore, when, in reality, she was always a nice looking girl with a nice figure who didn’t need to do all this shit in the first place.
Kim Kardashian, you are EXHAUSTING ME. However, I would like to take this time to point out how amazing Kourtney looks in all those unphotoshopped pics. 38 and with 3 kids and what looks like her real ass? Get it girl!
