“More Children!” Demands Brad Pitt

Brad Pitt wants more children, although it's unclear if Pitt meant more of the children that you go to vaguely ethnic countries to buy or more of the children that are made by having sex and then going to live in Namibia for a while.

But it doesn't matter - Brad Pitt is currently at the Venice Film Festival promoting his new movie The Assassination Of Jesse James By The Coward Robert Ford. But, having realised that repeating the movie's title over and over again will probably give him an asthma attack, Brad Pitt has decided to announce that he's ready to have more children with Angelina Jolie. Although people have been reading Brad's statement as a desire to father more biological children, we can't yet rule out the possibility that Brad and Angelina are going to choose their next adopted child via a televised search show entitled The Third World's Got Talent, so that Brad Pitt can finally realise his dreams of fathering a tiny Somalian juggler.

You've got to love Brad Pitt's logic. Between him and Angelina Jolie, they'll literally stop at nothing to protect the privacy of their children, whether they're sending the Secret Service into retrieve stolen cameras, continually getting photographers arrested or watching their bodyguards choke members of the press. However, just as Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie aren't above whoring their children out for charity, they don't mind carping on about their private lives if it makes people go and see their films.

Brad Pitt is at the Venice Film Festival at the moment promoting The Assassination Of Jesse James By The Coward Robert Ford, a 160-minute western that was filmed two years ago, got snarled up in an editing battle between Pitt and the director and has now been called 'self-indulgant' by those who have seen it. That paves the way for a lot of intelligent talk about artistic vision, the natural creative disputes that come during the filmmaking process and the film's themes of obsessive hero-worship, but Brad Pitt probably just thought it'd be easier to scream "I want a baby!" like a broody 35-year-old single woman at a christening. TMZ reports:

When asked if they were ready for more kids, Pitt said, "Yeah, we're ready." Said Pitt during an interview with an Italian TV station during the Venice Film Festival, having kids, "is the most fun I've had and also the biggest pain … I've ever experienced. I love it and can't recommend it any more highly — although sleep is nonexistent." 

So Brad Pitt wants to have more children, although we have to suspect that he'll need to sit down with Angelina Jolie and discuss the various pros and cons of having a baby biologically against adopting another child. For instance, if Brad Pitt wants another biological child it'll be good because those ones are more fashionable but bad because Angelina will probably go and make him live in Africa for a few months again. On the other hand, Brad Pitt might not be too keen on adoption because he's worried that Angelina's constant adoption is becoming something of a global joke, but he'll need to weigh that up against the prospect of having even more Christmases.

It's swings and roundabouts, that's for sure, but we think that the moral of this story is that we don't really want to see Brad Pitt's new film very much.

Read more:

Brangelina: We're Ready For More! - TMZ