As a newly-resurgent box office force, Mickey Rourke can now use his fame to raise awareness of anything he likes.
So he has. And what good cause has Mickey Rourke chosen to promote? Why, the unnecessary proliferation of dog testicles. Mickey Rourke has taken part in a PETA campaign to urge dog owners to neuter their pets.
Mickey says this is to stop the murder of millions of unwanted puppies each year, but we think differently – we think Mickey Rourke uses mashed-up dog testicles as a facial filler to mask his weird plastic surgery and that he’s on a stockpile drive.
Mickey Rourke, make no mistake, is the greatest Christmas gift we’ve ever received. Sure, we’ve seen plenty of written-off actors make spectacular comebacks in our time – like when Sylvester Stallone made Rocky Balboa or when Steven Seagal decided to set Under Siege 3 in space – but Mickey Rourke blows them all out of the water. This is for four primary reasons:
1) Mickey Rourke has won unbelievable critical acclaim for his role in The Wrestler.
2) Mickey Rourke has become one of the world’s most highly sought-after actors because of his role in The Wrestler.
3) Mickey Rourke has a face that looks like a water bomb that’s been filled with Ardennes pate and dropped down an abandoned lift shaft.
4) Now that he’s famous, Mickey Rourke won’t bloody shut up about his dogs.
This was apparent on Sunday, when Mickey Rourke essentially dedicated his Golden Globe win to all of his dead pets. But just in case that wasn’t enough, he’s now also decided to take part in a PETA campaign to encourage dog owners to castrate their pets. People reports:
Cradling his Chihuahua, Jaws, in PETA’s new ad, the actor urges people to “have the cojones to fix your dog. When dogs get knocked up, puppies get put down because there aren’t enough homes for them… The most important thing about having a dog and loving a dog is keeping the dog its whole natural life,” says Rourke, who adds that “you have a responsibility to communicate with your animal how much he means to you.”
And there was us thinking that PETA stood for People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals. How wrong we were – turns out it’s actually an acronym for Please Eliminate Testicles Agonisingly. We’ll remember that.
However, just because it doesn’t seem to count canine genital mutilation as cruelty, we shouldn’t write off PETA’s campaign straight away. If Mickey Rourke says that keeping the bollocks on your dog will end up with the death of some unwanted puppies, then maybe it’s our responsibility to make sure that doesn’t happen.
Also, if we do it now then PETA won’t have to resort to its plan B – Mickey Rourke’s ‘I’d Rather Go Naked Than Not Neuter My Pet’ billboard campaign. Nobody deserves to see that.
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{ 11 comments… read them below or add one }
Loving the water bomb line.
I think it was cool Micky dedicated his Golden Glode win to his dogs, but it’s a bit odd that a person who thinks so highly of the dogs in his life, he wants to deny that bond to others. If you castrate all male dogs there won’t be another generation. More realisticly though:
1) It is not having an intact dog that is irresponsible, it’s having unplanned litters. The two are far from synonymous.
2) Castrating male dogs has very little effect on canine populations. What does have an effect is sapying or controlling female dogs. If you are careless with a female in heat – letting her run loose or tying her in the yard unsupervised – there is a good chance a male will get to her. You would have to castrate every male dog to prevent it, but every female who is spayed or under control prevents unintentional breeding regardless of how many intact males are around.
3) There is an increasing amount of research indicating it is healthier, on average, for male dogs to stay intact, at least until they are fully mature (1 – 4 years of age, depending on the size of the dog). The same is true of female dogs, though the pros and cons are more balanced.
4) Voluntary altering has been an important contributor to reducing the population of unwanted dogs, but mandatory altering has increased euthanasias wherever it has been tried.
5) The problem of unwanted dogs is not due to overpopulation, it’s due to a lack of retention and irresponsible owners. In most parts of the country, young puppies are rare in shelters. The dogs being abandoned had owners who got tired of them, or couldn’t keep them for one reason or another. The most common age group in shelters is young adult dogs. In some areas of the country shelters are importing puppies and small dogs from rural shelters and even from other countries to fill the demand. In California the border patrol estimates over 10,000 young puppies are smuggled into the US every year from Mexico because there aren’t enough puppies to fill the demand.
Hey Linda…. You rock. Haha.
Nothing left to add. You said it all.
This article is terrible. And the comment above is full of opinion and unvalidated information.
The comment above is accurate . Euthanasia rates and raw numbers have plummetted in this country for the last 20 years . If only someone would neuter Mickey , it would prevent the spread of one source on nonsensical PETA ramblings
Sorry to disappoint you Joe but every statement in the original response is entirely accurate. Do your own research instead of believing the drivel hsus and peta spoonfeed you all in the hope that you will continue to continue to donate to their warchest already worth hundreds of millions.
7 Things You Didn’t Know About PETA
(People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals)
1) According to government documents, PETA employees have killed more than 19,200 dogs, cats, puppies, and kittens since 1998. This behavior continues despite PETA’s moralizing about the “unethical” treatment of animals by farmers, scientists, restaurant owners, circuses, hunters, fishermen, zookeepers, and countless other Americans. PETA puts to death over 90 percent of the animals it accepts from members of the public who expect the group to make a reasonable attempt to find them adoptive homes. PETA holds absolutely no open-adoption shelter hours at its Norfolk, VA headquarters, choosing instead to spend part of its $32 million annual income on a contract with a crematory service to periodically empty hundreds of animal bodies from its large walk-in freezer.
2 ) PETA president and co-founder Ingrid Newkirk has described her group’s overall goal as “total animal liberation.” This means the complete abolition of meat, milk, cheese, eggs, honey, zoos, aquariums, circuses, wool, leather, fur, silk, hunting, fishing, and pet ownership. In a 2003 profile of Newkirk in The New Yorker, author Michael Specter wrote that Newkirk has had at least one seeing-eye dog taken away from its blind owner. PETA is also against all medical research that requires the use of animals, including research aimed at curing AIDS and cancer.
3) PETA has given tens of thousands of dollars to convicted arsonists and other violent criminals. This includes a 2001 donation of $1,500 to the North American Earth Liberation Front (ELF), an FBI-certified “domestic terrorist” group responsible for dozens of firebombs and death threats. During the 1990s, PETA paid $70,200 to Rodney Coronado, an Animal Liberation Front (ALF) serial arsonist convicted of burning down a Michigan State University research laboratory. In his sentencing memorandum, a federal prosecutor implicated PETA president Ingrid Newkirk in that crime. PETA vegetarian campaign coordinator Bruce Friedrich has also told an animal rights convention that “blowing stuff up and smashing windows” is “a great way to bring about animal liberation,” adding, “Hallelujah to the people who are willing to do it.”
4) PETA activists regularly target children as young as six years old with anti-meat and anti-milk propaganda, even waiting outside their schools to intercept them without notifying their parents. One piece of kid-targeted PETA literature tells small children: “Your Mommy Kills Animals!” PETA brags that its messages reach over 1.2 million minor children, including 30,000 kids between the ages of 6 and 12, all contacted by e-mail without parental supervision. One PETA vice president told the Fox News Channel’s audience: “Our campaigns are always geared towards children, and they always will be.”
5) PETA’s president has said that “even if animal research resulted in acure for AIDS, we would be against it.” And PETA has repeatedly attacked research foundations like the March of Dimes, the Pediatric AIDS Foundation, and the American Cancer Society, solely because they support animal-based research aimed at curing life-threatening diseases and birth defects. And PETA helped to start and manage a quasi-medical front group, the misnamed Physicians Committee for Responsible Medicine, to attack medical research head-on.
6) PETA has compared Jewish victims of the Nazi Holocaust to farm animals and Jesus Christ to pigs. PETA’s religious campaigns include a website that claims—despite ample evidence to the contrary—that Jesus Christ was a vegetarian. PETA holds protests at houses of worship, even suing one church that tried to protect its members from Sunday-morning harassment. Its billboards taunt Christians with the message that hogs “died for their sins.” PETA insists, contrary to centuries of rabbinical teaching, that the Jewish ritual of kosher slaughter shouldn’t be allowed. And its infamous “Holocaust on Your Plate” campaign crassly compared the Jewish victims of Nazi genocide to farm animals.
7) PETA frequently looks the other way when its celebrity spokespersons don’t practice what it preaches. As gossip bloggers and Hollywood journalists have noted, Pamela Anderson’s Dodge Viper (auctioned to benefit PETA) had a “luxurious leather interior”; Jenna Jameson was photographed fishing, slurping oysters, and wearing a leather jacket just weeks after launching an anti-leather campaign for PETA; Morrissey got an official “okay” from PETA after eating at a steakhouse; Dita von Teese has written about her love of furs and foie gras; Steve-O built a career out of abusing small animals on film; the officially “anti-fur” Eva Mendes often wears fur anyway; and Charlize Theron’s celebrated October 2007 Vogue cover shoot featured several suede garments. In 2008, “Baby Phat” designer Kimora Lee Simmons became a PETA spokesmodel despite working with fur and leather, after making a $20,000 donation to the animal rights group.
Want evidence? Visit
http://www.AnimalScam.com • http://www.ActivistCash.com • http://www.PetaKillsAnimals.com
You know what I think I’d like is mandatory alteration (or euthanasia) of LindaH. Whichever is more convenient, really.
Yeah, it sucks when somebody is right huh?
You’re a douche. Linda is right.
Also, you’re a douche.
PETA is a pack of lunatics.
I fix all my pets because I don’t want to deal with baby animals crapping all over my stuff.
Jesus…This is the third article I’ve read that you’ve done on Rourke, the second where you critique the guys looks. How low can you go? Some things people can’t change.
As for the whole PETA thing…I don’t care for PETA one bit but spaying/neutering isn’t such a bad thing if you aren’t a breeder or don’t really know what you’re doing.
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