Michael Jackson: The Movie – Coming Disappointingly Soon
In his lifetime, Michael Jackson flourished in all mediums – music, films about gay-looking scarecrows.
Really long, slightly tedious music videos. All of them. But what about horrifying, legacy-destroying, drug-addled posthumous 3D tour rehearsal movies? Michael Jackson rules at those, too – Sony will apparently buy the rights to Michael Jackson’s final rehearsal footage, and the High School Musical director will release it before Christmas.
That’s if he can animate the six-foot dancing Plasticine rabbit in time, because a Michael Jackson movie without a Plasticine rabbit is like a Michael Jackson story without a shoehorned-in reference to Jesus Juice – weird and incomplete.
Michael Jackson may have died, but he hasn’t left us. Every time someone breaks free of the shackles of normality and bursts into dance, he’s still with us. Every time someone sings with a passion that defies their slight frame, he’s still with us. Every time someone loads up on a dangerous amount of medical anaesthetic and locks themselves away in their heavily fortified bedroom with an uncomfortable number of children, he’s still with us.
And for those of us without the imagination to remember Michael Jackson that way, there’s always the upcoming Michael Jackson concert rehearsal movie to fall back on. True, from what we’ve seen of it, you’ll be remembering a frail-looking man with an upsettingly disfigured face who halfheartedly paces through a number of dance moves that he clearly has no intention of ever performing in public, but whatever.
And you won’t have long to wait to see it, either – according to reports, Sony is about to buy 80 hours of rehearsal footage from AEG for $50 million, and it’ll be turned into a movie by High School Musical director Kenny Ortega by the end of the year.
There’s nothing wrong with that, of course – it’s not like one of the last things that Michael Jackson did before he died was record a career-tarnishing new version of the iconic Thriller video in 3D so that audiences could use it to see exactly how much he’d squandered his life on drugs and needless cosmetic surgery procedures. Was it? Was it, Variety?
Sony Pictures is close to a deal to make a feature film on Michael Jackson drawing on the 80 hours of rehearsal footage filmed for concerts Jackson was preparing to perform in London. The film will feature at least three videos, including an alternative version of Jackson’s “Thriller,” which were shot to be interstitial programming during the concerts. The footage was meant to play in 3-D.
Oh.
Anyway, it’ll be interesting to see how else Sony manages to beef up this final Michael Jackson movie. If you ask us, there should definitely be a bit in it where Lando Calrissian tells Whoopi Goldberg what a blast it’d be to dance for Michael Jackson.
What? That’s already been done? Son of a bitch.
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stuart heritage a jelous prick who has to try and think hes gud by talking bad about michael jackson, yu aint done nuffin with yur life so quiet down yu fuckin cunt, yu look like a fuckin cunt who id smash in the face, go and die sumwhere cuz no1 wil care once yu have gone
Well said mate!!!!!
How is that well said? It was barely written in English. What the fuck is a “gud”???
Fuck You Bitch And Your Mama To. We Will Be Glad When You Die. You Low Down Cock Sucker.
What a loser… get a life….. only he without sin can judge.. people like u the reson why the human race will never be nothing more then it is…. I detest you… you disgust me…
What an insensitive, disgusting write up, if you can call this ‘writing’. I call it trash of the worst kind. Michael Jackson did so much for this world, for charities, for those he came into contact with. Do your reading like a proper journalist Mr Heritage and you will find out the truth rather than resorting to tabloid sleaze. Everyone will get what they deserve at the end of this life and be assured that you will not be spared for this revolting piece of pure hatred. Proud of yourself for writing this? Big deal, heard it all before. What a loser.
That’s a bit hard on Yu. What have you got against the Chinese?
stuart ur a dick. your just another lame journalist or blogger whatever your proud to call youself. if you have no interest in mj plz do not write about him. im sure you will be able to bounce back and make fun of another celebrity cause thats what your good at. i mean you could never be one so why not make fun of them.
and ya FUCK YOU
urgh, that’s disgusting. trash. get a life and stop insulting mj fans. you have obviously no idea of how much the world is grieving. we remember him for who he was: a wonderful, caring, kind, loving and graceful person. he was our hero, a true angel sent from above to teach the humanity of true love and the meaning of life. may he rest in peace. no more pain..
Kristina, I totally agree with you, there are so many people out there still so sad, we lost a great talent and a wonderful Human being, we love you michael!
The ever-literate ‘f**k u’ is right, Stuart. You can’t hold a light to Michael Jackson seeing as you’ve never recorded a hit song with Paul McCartney, worn a single, spangly glove like some kind of camp golfer, paid off kids to avoid abuse charges, had a weird relationship with a chimpanzee or had so much plastic surgery that you look like some kind of pale, ghostly quasi-human polymorph with no nose and a speaking voice that sounds like a gay Mickey Mouse on helium.
Until you have done these things you must be forever mute.
I call all of those who call him “Jacko” as Sicko…So Just like Sicko Heritage, you are another one who is a dumb as an ass who has not done his homework, who knows nothing but tabloid trash about Michael Jackson…If you want to see a gay Mickey Mouse on Helium I suggest that you bare your bottom and look into the mirror to see exactly just that…..Idiot!
Quick hint for you: full stops do not always need to be used in groups of three. Seriously.
Ellipses, they’re called. And they do if you’re a lunatic, Shooty. Mark of a true nutter, misuse of ellipses. Gotta remember that.
As for breaking free of the shackles of normality and bursting into dance, I’m pretty sure when I do that, it’s all the drugs, not the spirit of Jacko.
u r soooo out of touch.
when u can have 1 billion people stop to remember u at your memorial, then u will be at liberty to speak.
Legacy……..its all about legacy.
You are a worst kind of jealous man, stuart – a racist.
How can you talk so much about a celebrity who has passed away!!
That shows your meanness. You never mentioned about Michael’s charities, his polite nature, his great voice and his once-in-a-millenium talent.
People like u had crucified Jesus.
MJ IS ATLEAST AS GREAT AS JESUS CHRIST. Stop maligning him.
Wahey! Someone played the race card!
I’ve noticed a few sockpuppets playing the race card on here today as it goes. I’m pretty sure they’re all the same nutter, one with dreadful taste in music.
since the Jweish boy Chandler accused him of molestation in 1993 got the money from the insurance company, run and refused to testify at a criminal trial although the only thing jackson asked for in the settlement which was paid by the insurance not even mj was to inform his lawyers 6 days before proceeding with a criminal trial so they would be prepared,
the boy was willing to go to a civil trial and when the jewish family got the extortion money , justice no longer seemed important to them.
is it a coincidence that almost all the people who stole, tried to destroy Jackson’s legacy , bertrayed him were Shylocks ?.
and you are another one Stuart, only people don’t belive your stories any more, you don’t have reputation for being honest shylocks .
Yes it was the Jews what did it. If all the haters realised this then all the hating might stop.
The fact that there are rabid fans playing the race card AND rabid fans posting disturbing anti-Semitic screeds is beyond priceless. I’m glad he’s dead, because you people are funny as fuck.
Aw, look! The maniacal MJ fan group is still together. Cute. I, for one, am game for a spot of dead paedophile bashing. I chuckle like a hyena! Toodle-pip.
That’s not very nice.
The haters who would still think of Michael as someone who abused kids usually don’t really care abt the whole false allegations in the first place and have not read the truthful evidences, or proof that are available. They already made up their mind that Michael was guilty in the first place and apparently, that’s that!
Trusting and clinging on to every single piece of tabloid news as gospel. Yes tabloid news, the ones that make stuff and juicy gossip up all the time for sales!
Are all of MJ’s fans retarded?
Oh, I’m sorry. That was quite a slam I just made against the mentally disabled.
mst3kster
In answer to your question, YES all MJ fans are retarted. I personally belive it’s the flouride in the water combined with some subliminal message coming through the radio/tv.
Why else would they devote themselves to someone who didn’t know thier names or knew they existed.
This mass hysteria about MJ is a complete mystery to me. People are falling down praising this deviant freak.
On top of all that, they can’t take anything thats contrary to their popular belifs and barely understand satire. Furthermore, they likely think “Dumb and Dumber” to be an artsy film thats too hard to understand, and are more comfortable with “Big Momma’s House 3 – Oh’ oh Momma’s had too much fried food and now is constipated, what are we going to do?”
Hope that clears things up.
JM
lol stereotypical moron. Or should I say maroon so you’ll understand. lol
Jordan Chandler has admitted that he lied when he accused Michael Jackson of sexually molesting him in 1993.
The news has been reported by the BGNES news agency which cites an interview with Chandler in an American news website.
Chandler is quoted as saying that back in 1993, when he was 13, he was forced to lie by his father. Chandler’s accusations caused a scandal that stained irreparably the reputation of the King of Pop, who died last Thursday.
The child molestation case against Jacko ended after the singer agreed to pay Jordan Chandler’s family USD 22 M.
Now that you have been told the truth, all you MJ haters can go back to hell where you belong.
Right on!!!!
here here! Cheers!
it’s good to know who u’r talking about, herifreakntage! wake up! u will never get even close to MJ’s toes. so try not to feel good about ur sarcastic, jealous and idiotic remarks about a legend!
fuck all the mj haters.leave him alone atleast now u fuckers.you ruined his life.now u want his childrens lives too.u are the real child molesters.
You are a douchebag with no soul, no heart, no passion.
Haters end up alone for eternity. Enjoy that ya tool.
This writer is a fucking dick!
Wow! This guy writes only lies. Every time he writes something there is only bitterness and jealousy. Is there anything good in this world for you? You need a reality check body because this is not a real job. We already know that the “molested” boy lied for the money so maybe you can write about him and how he and his family should give the money back and go to jail because they are the real wacko’s.
If all the accusations against Jackson were false why did he pay off one accuser from 1990 $2M and another in 1993 $15 to $20M? The insurance company, in ‘93, just may have forced Jackson to settle b/c of ‘90 as well as Terry George (google this name for this last piece of info.).
Jackson was the world’s greatest entertainer, bar none, definitely with a pulse on pop trends and the pop single, but he also has the above history, as well.
Everyone Fuck Off and leave Michael Jackson alone!!!!! It is people like you why the world will never Heal!!!!! Instead of going around focusing on the trivial things about him, why don’t you take a page from his book, LOOK IN THE MIRROR AND MAKE A CHANGE!!!!!!! Then maybe, just maybe this world may see some improvement!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
If you cant see the genius of MJ that many of your peers can then your blind and clearly stupid. Get a life. Its people like you that caused genius like him to have a sad life. You should be ashamed of yourself. You call this reporting – its garbage mate.
I thought his sad life came from repeated beatings by his dad, plastic surgery and unnatural urges.
Squandered his life on drugs and needless cosmetic procedures? What a big lie! You intentionally dismissed and devalued Michael Jackson as a humanitarian, whose passion and everything he had stood for never changed since he was young. Not only this man donated $300 million dollars (and still counting when the 20% of his wealth added)to many charities and foundations he supported, but he was also active on his charity work. Have you heard his speeches for his Heal The World foundation? Have you listened to his past interviews which would give you an insight as to why he loved children? Go listen to his Oxford 2001 speech. This was the man who eloquently connected the negative ills and violence in our world with the lost of childhood or the lack of love in childhood. If you only tried to get to know him before you judge him, you will understand why it is incomprehensible for many of us to believe that this man could ever harm a child or let alone do something malicious. It may be strange for anyone of you to understand why we love Michael Jackson, because you failed to see and failed to separate the true Michael Jackson from the sensationalized made up Michael that you created.
This guy is dead, let’s get on with life. People die everyday but we dont talk about them everywhere we go. It’s sad he died but he was just a pop singer, not someone who invented the cure for cancer. I think the media is making too big a deal of this. I know he donated a lot of money but so do many people, but we dont start message boards to speak about them. Next thing you know MJ will be in the history books in school!
That would be friggin scary if they had this clown in the history books.
You Cant Get Mad Cause People Want The Famous Michael Jackson In Their Books And Not You HAHAHAHAHAHa Eat Dat
that was a shitty comment… maybe too much bran…
WHAT A GREAT IDEA YES HE WILL BE IN THE HISTORY BOOKS BECAUSE MY UNCLE WRITES SOME OF THEM. MICHAEL JACKSON IS AWESOME AND WILL GO DOWN IN HISTORY JUST LIKE HE SAID. I ABSOLUTELY LOVE HIM AND EVERYTHING HE STOOD FOR. THANKS FOR THE IDEA—-JERK.
Don’t forget to include how he molested little boys when you add him to the history books. Oh yea he paid them off so I guess you think thats ok.
Hey james, you are right! he might be on the History books you never know, look at Elvis Presley HE IS HISTORY! Michael is part of history weather you like it or not, our children’s children will talk about him, there will always be something to talk about weather is Good or bad, thats just a part of life…..
You say Michael was frail looking and doing half-hearted dance steps that he never intended performing in public…obviously you haven’t been paying attention to how Michael rehearses. He almost never put much energy into a rehearsal. When there was 500,000 yelling fans in the audience to channel their energy into Michael THEN let the show go on. I think that no matter what SONY puts out, it won’t be a Michael J. Jackson expression!
FUCK ALL OF YOU ASS HOLES BASHING ON MJ! Everyone has bad decisions in life, and MJ may have made a few, but that changes nothing about who he was and what he had done. He had donated MILLIONS of dollars, more money than most of you hateful bastards will hope to ever see in you life, to charity. So, in closing, FUCK YOURSELVES!
Regardless of whatever MJ did in his life I, and many others, reserve the right to dislike him. I remember when MJ was black and had a nose on his face. He never got over the whiny voice that smacks of fingernails on chalkboard. MJ denied having any treatment to his nose or skin color and we are supposed to look at him and agree? Obviously the poor boy hated whatever state he was in and that’s why he kept trying to be something he wasn’t. The little fuck never did a thing for me. I don’t care for people that hate themselves! So you can all just go BEAT IT!
Future reply: When you are accosted daily by something you don’t care for (e.g., whiny voice, false front, overblown news-mercial media coverage, etc.) you don’t have to hate the guy in order dislike him. It’s a right I get to have. I don’t have to buy your product so I take it out of my face. Selling MJ is a hot item right now. Keep the money rolling in and they’ll keep pumping it out. Wanna buy some burnt hair? Fucking christian republicans!
HAHA WTF… The media is controlling people so well, a couple of years ago he was a disgusting pervert, there were ugly pictures of him all around the place where he looked disgusting and now hes a fucking hero to everybody?
REMEMBER PEOPLE!
He was a dead idol already! The death of MJ and all that drama about him on TV just shows how twisted news are, they have become advertising. We are being controlled and tested by media so fucking much and everybody is following like sheep