When famous people die, it’s quite common for their devoted fans to spend months in mourning. Or in the case of Michael Jackson fans, quite probably forever.

For superstar like individuals, their memories go on forever. In Michael’s case, it will be through his music and various court cases.

Despite kicking the bucket in June, Michael Jackson is still all over the news. This time, it’s all about a tribute TV show about him. Whilst we thought the Bo Selecta program was good enough, people still want more. And so Jermaine Jackson is set to host a brand new show for BBC 3 where he aims to find people who can quite literally moonwalk the bum out of the dancefloor.

It’s odd really – a massive chunk of the TV schedule is going to be given up for an X Factor meets Britain’s Got Talent to find someone who can dance like Michael Jackson. How times have changed. We don’t believe for one second that when Elvis farted himself to death, TV producers back then held burger-eating competitions as a fitting tribute.

Now we might not be the brightest sparks but, casting our minds back to Britain’s Got Talent a few years ago, we remember a couple of dancers. It wasn’t that pesky George Sampson or Diversity. Thinking about it really hard, it was a duo called Signature. During their first round audition, they came out and boogied on down to some songs inspired by no other then monkey lover Michael Jackson.

BBC 3! We know you struggle to fill your schedule with shows that aren’t repeats of EastEnders, constant reruns of existing shows like Family Guy and one of documentaries featuring so-called cool people like George Lamb. But as license fee payers, we’re telling you that this Michael Jackson show doesn’t need to be made. Just bloody crown Signature the winners.

Because he now has a chance of becoming the most popular Jackson, Jermaine Jackson told the BBC:

“Michael inspired people across the world to master his moves and create their own unique routines.”

We’d like to believe Jermaine Jackson there, but we don’t think that quote is completely true. Michael was a crap dancer until he had his regular lessons with Joe Jackson. Armed with his trust belt, he taught more to Michael then any teacher could. How do you think the track Beat It got its name? Jermaine added further:

“I’m really excited and delighted to be part of this show and look forward to finding the UK’s most talented and inspiring dancers.”

Out of the thousands that will appear in front of the camera, the majority will be utterly gash, a few will wave like idiots and say hello to their mum, some might believe it’s their ticket to bagging a footballer and the rest might remember what the show is about. Honestly, Michael will be literally turning in his gold-plated grave and gnawing on his silver glove in horror at the thought of this. And we wouldn’t want that now, would we?

We’ll only watch if Bubbles is the judge and eliminates the losers by throwing his droppings at the contestants.

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