Mel Gibson's got a tough time ahead of him now, as he attempts to show the world that his boring, dead-language based new movie Apocalypto is anywhere as near as fun as the time he drunkenly raged against the Jews.
And it looks as if Mel Gibson has found exactly the right tone to take up while showing off unfinished versions of Apocalypto around America – instead of constantly apologising for almost wrecking his career with a bottle of tequila and some suspect views about the Jewish faith, Mel Gibson is drawing comparisons between Apocalypto and the Iraq war, which he's not really a fan of. Also, the late inclusion of a new Apocalypto character named Officer Sugar Tits is thought to have made Apocalypto into a real zinger of a film.
That Mel Gibson's a tenacious bugger, isn't he? The majority of other people – had they been arrested for drink driving, then slagged off all the fucking Jews, threatened to anally rape the arresting officer, claimed ownership of Malibu and then called a female officer "Sugar Tits" – would have just quietly snuck into rehab, apologised profusely and then gone to live a quiet reclusive life living off all the millions of hard-earnt Jesus dollars.
Not Mel Gibson, though; he's been defended by Hollywood and attacked by Spartacus and avoided jail for his drunken behaviour, and now he's on the comeback. It couldn't really be any other way, since Mel Gibson will soon see the release of his confusing-looking Apocalypto movie, possibly in December, and he needs to start building the Apocalypto hype – even if most of the world currently thinks he's a bit of a dick. That's why Mel Gibson took an unfinished version of Apocalypto to the Fantastic Fest in Austin, Texas for an early viewing. Some of the crowd who saw Apocalypto apparently gave the movie a standing ovation, but Mel drew a lot more attention for comparing Apocalypto to the Iraq war. According to Mel Gibson:
"The precursors to a civilisation that's going under are the same, time and time again. What's human sacrifice if not sending guys off to Iraq for no reason?"
Without getting into the politics of what Mel Gibson said, it's a smart move on his part. By making vaguely exaggerated claims like these, people will be quicker to forget that Mel Gibson is the boozy Jew-hating misogynist from What Women Want. Also, now Apocalypto gets to be a scathingly relevant comment on the way the world is run today and not a ridiculously bloated vanity project from a man with a slightly higher opinion of himself than everyone else.
We have to admit that we're a little bit annoyed with Mel Gibson, though – if Apocalypto is Mel Gibson's Iraq movie, then that means we won't be treated to a typically preposterously overegged Mel Gibson Iraq war film, where Mel Gibson gets to kill everyone in Iraq with an American flag converted into a machine gun. We were kind of looking forward to that, since we had money on Mel Gibson somehow blaming the British for everything in it like he did with Braveheart and The Patriot.
[story by Stuart Heritage]