Matt Damon Signs For Bourne 4: The Bourne Senility
Here’s some advance warning - Matt Damon and Paul Greengrass are making a fourth Bourne film, so stock up on the motion sickness pills while you still can.
That’s right - although The Bourne Ultimatum seemed to end with a satisfyingly piece of trilogy closure, you can now be pretty sure it didn’t. Bourne 4 is on the way and there’s nothing anybody can do about it.
Best of all, Bourne 4 will be the first Bourne film not to be based on a Robert Ludlum novel. Phew, finally we won’t have to worry about plot or character development or anything - just endless scenes of Matt Damon jumping across buildings and arbitrarily punching people while being filmed by what appears to be a drunk Parkinson’s sufferer trying to operate a pneumatic drill on a trampoline on a boat in a storm. Perfect.
Probably the most overwhelming thing about the new James Bond movie - other than that it’s boring and a bit crap and it stars a witch - is all the comparisons to the Bourne movies it has received.
No longer is James Bond a charmingly witty man with a jetpack and an invisible car who just happens to be a spy - he’s now just an angry bloke who punches things and jumps across buildings. He’s basically Jason Bourne.
It’s this kind of influence - alongside the fact that every single new action movie has to have at least one Parkour scene in it - that has made the Bourne movies into a sensation and, confusingly, turned Matt Damon into a sex symbol.
Despite only being memorable because it featured a train station we go to a lot and a spectacular set of sideburns, The Bourne Ultimatum was a giant hit at the box office - so much so that Universal has ditched its plan to keep Bourne as a trilogy and instead opted to keep banging the buggers out until the thought of another Bourne movie makes people physically ill. MSNBC reports:
Universal will produce a fourth installment in the popular “The Bourne Identity†franchise. Damon will return as superspy Jason Bourne, and Paul Greengrass (who directed “The Bourne Ultimatum†and “The Bourne Supremacyâ€) is also on board for the new film. While the previous three “Bourne†movies have been based on the novels by Robert Ludlum, the latest chapter will be an original story.
We don’t envy whoever’s tasked with writing Bourne 4, because the script will somehow need to get around the fact that at the end of The Bourne Ultimatum, Matt Damon uncovered all the secrets of his past, vowed to change and actually said the words “I am no longer Jason Bourne.”
So, in the spirit of fairness, we’d like to share three options that we think could reverse Bourne 4 out of the dead-end it has obviously found itself in…
1) After jumping into the East River at the end of The Bourne Ultimatum, Jason Bourne bangs his head on a fish and loses his memory all over again. Title - The Bourne Misfortune.
2) Even though the conspiracy over his identity reaches all the way to the highest echelons of the US government, Jason Bourne soon finds out that it goes even further, so he travels to heaven to have a shaky-camera fistfight with God. Title - The Bourne Divinity.
3) After saying “I am no longer Jason Bourne” at the end of The Bourne Ultimatum, Jason Bourne realises that, actually, his passport, driving license, bank account, gym membership and National Trust patronage card all bear the name Jason Bourne and decides that he can’t really be arsed to go through all the rigmarole of changing them back to his original name. Title - The Bourne Kerfuffle.
Once again Universal, you’re welcome.
“although The Bourne Ultimatum ended with a satisfyingly ambiguous scene where Matt Damon may have possibly drowned, you can now be pretty sure he didn’t”
erm..i take it you got up and left before he broke into a swim and all ended happily ever after then?
Very possibly. But I’ve changed it now, just to make you happy.
And also to make your comment look weird and out of place. I WIN FOREVER!
Is this your friends site and you guys just hang out and get really high and talk about how smart you are? I know people like you. How’s community college going for you? Just think, only 4 more years and you’ll be done!
Being as Ultimatum was essentially a re-run of Supremacy, how about Bourne Again Again? Or The Bourne Banality. Or Fletch.
Damon suggested “The Bourne Redundancy” during his promotional interviews. I think that sounds good.
Logically, I would expect Jason Bourne to now be satisfied with his own identity, and to open a 1-man detective agency to offer his hard-won skills to other people who are also in a state of confusion.
For example, he could jump from buildings and fight agents to the death while finding his neighbour’s mislaid bus-pass.
What I find funny is the “Bourne 4 will be the first Bourne film not to be based on a Robert Ludlum novel.” Well, actually the first three really didn’t have much in common with the books at all, minus the amnesia in France and a girl named Marie. Even the movie had Marie’s last name as different than the book. So technically, this fourth movie will still be based off the characters from the book.
What I would like to see is a set of movies that are actually based off Ludlum’s original Bourne story.
And I personally can’t wait to see a fourth one.
God damn you Stuart!!
Stuart Heritage is a fantastic journalist.
ok Stuart..so what are you implying exactly?, that a 4th bourne should not be made!! well some people ..i guess who reasons like u do..said that a 3rd person should not be made or will be bollocks after they saw the Bourne Supremacy..but hey what do you know..the Bourne Ultimatum kicked arse..and about the shaky camera man,Paul greengrass is not directing Gone With the Wind here..its Bourne we talkin about..so the kind of filmin he did was perfect..move along with Bourne durin the whole movie..
but hey (again) you guys just need to write some bullSh*t..
i bet after the bourne 4..you will write..it was not bad..it could have been better..which means or will mean that enjoyed it..but just cannot admit it..
let’s wait and see
thank you..f u and have a nice day!!
I don’t really understand your problem. the bourne series was one of the very few where every movie was a really good one. the stories were well developed and after the first movie they had nothing more in common with the books than the title. as far as I remember in the books everything is about getting the jackal and the ultimatum book ends with the grand finale.
I am very happy to see that a 4th bourne movie is made, as the scribes, the director and of course matt damon have returned
Hes one of the most efficient killers in the world you think every bodies just gonna leave him alone. cant wait for the next one
Ya’ll leave Stuart alone…he was simply breat-fed a little longer than most, thats all….
Bourne 4…can’t wait…for Bourne is the shizitzzu!
Ever eaten ice cream, you know there is a point when enjoying it where you think this is great.
But there is some leftover and so you eat it, but no long after you, you wish you hadn’t. Because that feeling of “wow” is forever gone.
That effect is called “greed”… Also Know As Bourne 4
i dont care what the 4th move is about,as long as its good as the last one i am happy. so what if it goes further and becomes another james bond kind of thing.
i just care about getting a kick out of it.
Start Jason Bourne 4 from it’s true beginning. How he opted to become Jason Bourne from David Webb, and where did he come from and why did Nikki say in Ultimatum that it was hard for her with him, did they have something going on before his amnesia and so forth, his first mission, Neski in Berlin, Wombosi when he lost his memory, well you get the point. Who and what was he before becoming Jason Bourne aka “Jason Bourne Genesis”.
How about “The Bourne Consequences” for the fourth part. Bourne left hell-of-a mess around all the places he’s being, and the situation is becoming a global political scandal which reaches all the way back to the CIA and NSA and even the president of U.S. Now bourne is still lost, even thou he found who he is and declared he’s no longer Jason Bourne, but the world is not going to take any chances. International political pressure forces the president to order the new Director of CIA, Pamela Landy, who’s being recently promoted, to find and take bourne into U.S custody. Even tho David Webb declared he’s no longer Jason Bourne, which means he doesn’t have anything to do with CIA anymore, the CIA is still coming back to get him, this time the order is directly from the top, the president. David Webb will be once again, forced to be Jason Bourne in order to survive. “The Bourne Consequences” will not be about hardcore fist fight or jumping between buildings, but will be more of a political thriller type. This time the name of the game is to be stealthy, not noisy. Webb will have to do his best to evade the CIA agents by staying low key, constantly switiching between identities, everything you can think of in a covert stealth operation.
In the 4th bourne, they bring back Marie (it wasn’t really her body) and she and there’s a love triangle between her and Nicki and Borne. Ultimately Pam Landy kills off both of them and her and Borne live happily ever after. And he becomes President.
1 - I liked 3 the best. Cinema snobs may flinch, but it was fun, and that’s why I go to the movies.
2 - The similarities to the books are: well, I can’t think of any really… so like another commenter said, the 4th won’t really be all that different.
So I am looking forward to 4. And 5.
This seems almost like the bourne haters group. If you don’t like the movie go find one you do like and promote it. There are obviously a lot of people who did like the ultimatum and I can’t wait for the next one. Why do they have to stop at 3 and why does the story have to be written by ludlow? These denoting statements all sound like petty nonsense. I don’t see how one can wake up and can’t wait to see who and how someone has responded to there trashing opinion of someone’s work, just seems like you have too much time on your hands. And with that though I have spent way too much time here, this is five minutes of my life I can’t get back…. DAMMIT!
Stuart I bet you were picked on if you went through public schooling. Too bad you never made anything of yourself and your only job is to hate on people that have actually achieved in life. Tell me where you are so I can come and punch you in the face.
Wow…first and last time I read anything that this Stu Hermitage writes. You don’t like the Bourne trilogy? That’s all I need to know that you know nothing about great movies. Amazing that nonsense like this this gets paid for.
What a horrible article. If you didnt like the series then go find some other movie to write about. You attack a series that was able to excite an audiance throughout the whole movie. You’re an idiot.
I totally agree with John. That article was horrible. To call the
reviewer an idiot is mild. I would have said something a lot stronger. The reviewer certainly loves movies that are written
for mass production and wouldn’t know a good movie if it bit her.
I really like the Bourne series. For your criticism about lack of plot. All 3 films could be edited together to make one film. So for fans like me who have seen all 3 films. WE get the overall plot is woven throughout all 3 films. Which is a man who under the pretense of doing patriotic duty for his country. Joins an elite service. He is subsequently brain washed into a killer on command with no conscience. That is the back story learned from watching all 3 films. The films begin with Bourne/Damon being fished out of ocean after being shot. We later learn his breaking point was attempting to kill a man marked for assassin in front of his children. This sets Bourne’s programmed wiring into disarray and amnesia. Now off the ranch and trying to discover who and what he has done in name of government. The CIA needs to shutdown Bourne and coverup what later is found to be a corrupt/illegal black Op’s operation. Which we later find out in 2nd film was used for personal and professional gain by the CIA head’s running the black op’s operation. The third film finally reveals Bourne’s full memory of how and why he joined the CIA program. The fact the program is still continuing after being shut down under a new name and CIA head. The continued efforts of CIA to coverup operation and Bourne’s final confrontation with the CIA head who mislead him into the black op’s program. Interspersed throughout films are of course chase/action sequences as CIA/government types trys to stop Bourne who is always cleverly one step ahead of them. Interwoven in all 3 films is the emotional toll Bourne has carried as he realizes the deeds he has perfromed as assassin Bourne and the ramifications of confronting that reality. Now that seems like a pretty multi-layered plot to me for what are ACTION film’s. The fact all 3 films in my opinion are entertaining is a credit to the filmmakers who by this time could have just mailed in #3 and made money. As for not being like books… I don’t care cause after first 2 books the books aren’t that good. The jerky camera work does not bother me and in fact makes for re-seeing the film’s worth while. Yeah I am a fan but what I have noticed because of popularity of series. A small minority meaning you Stuart have come out making fun of the series mainly because it seems “COOL” to criticise something that is popular. I have no problem if you don’t like the films. But your critisism that there is no plot etc… Is just wrong. I hope #4 is good but understand it’s being made because #3 made alot of money. Based on track record I give Damon and filmmakers the benefit of doubt. I also disagree with your take on Damon. I think Damon is a fine actor and part of the series popularity is Damon doesn’t look like an action star. Does a small asian man look like a martial arts artist who can kick your azz? NO, but he will still kick your azz.
Well…about Bourne movies with Paul Greengrass…I don’t think it was such a good idea after all. 1st he killed Mary Kreuz,on Supremacy…then he tried to put Bourne & Nikki Parsons,as ex lovers on Bourne Ulitmatum…when they actually don’t have any connection at all. Remembered on Supremacy,when Nikki said we talking about killing Bourne. Who knows what stupid ideas he will have this time?! Akeem
You don’t even know the story… First the whole drive! Plot momentum to get Bourne pissed off to go after CIA black ops controller’s in Supremacy was the killing of his GF. Without that there is no movie. Greengrass never tried to put Bourne and Nikki together. There was no sex/romantic scene. There was a moment where Nikki reminded Bourne of Mary in Ultimatum. Fact is Nikki worked for CIA from beginning and was Bourne’s controller. There was the scene in diner where it was suggested that Bourne and Nikki had a “thing” going on before he lost his memory. Which he had no recollection. Which if you back track makes PERFECT sense because Nikki is an attractive woman. She was his controller and Bourne being under a semblance of brain washing would have been sexually attracted to Nikki since she was his controller for CIA. Who else was he gonna “fuck?” She saw how CIA mind “f_cked” Bourne and the others in first film. Nikki was still in that upstairs safe house when Bourne killed almost everyone and let her live several times throughout series. Nikki was still a young opeartive. Fact is this series is very good and better than 80% of the junk hollywood churns out. Why people who are in a minority continue try bashing this series is beyond my understanding. How many triology’s out there were all good films? Answer: NOT VERY FREAKING MANY!!!
I’ve just finished watching all 3 Bournes yesterday.
Before yesterday, I always thought they wouldn’t be so good. And I never bothered to watch or ask about them. Guess what.. I found out I was wrong the whole time!
It was a really fantastic series. The first one, perfect.. so I was afraid, the 2nd won’t be good, like the others, but it didn’t, in fact, it gets better and better untill the very end of the 3rd one.
It has to be put into my all-time favorite action-thriller movies. And I am definitly gonna pay to watch the 4thin the cinema (which I very rarely do). I will sure as hell be in the DVD store as soon as it comes out. I will sure as hell be enjoying that.
Can’t wait anymore for it.
I think the Bourne movies are the best actions movies ever made and even up there on the list of best movies ever. Typically action movies have no point except action, which is a stupid point, but these are good way down to the core. The shakiness bothers some people which is fine but I think it helps set the mood. I don’t know much about Matt Damon as a person and I hope he isn’t as conceited as you say he is. I hate it when actors who play awesome characters turn out to be jerks. Most movies I’ve seen that are only made because the previous ones have made loads of money are pretty lame and I hope the fourth Bourne movie won’t be like that. I hate it when they ruin my favorite movies that way.
Julia Stiles … Nicolette Needs to also continue, there is something between Jason and Nicolette that wasn’t brought out in the series.
ABOUT TIME WE WAITED SO LONG FOR THIS FOURTH-LOGY !!
man…your an idiot…
your opinion iz just shit…
and…nobody cares…