Brace Yourself. Mark Wahlberg Ready to Ruin the Next ‘Transformers’ Movie

Mark Wahlberg has a nice smile.

Apparently, there’s going to be yet another Transformers movie. The good news is, there’s a silver lining, and no, it’s not Megan Fox’s bare midriff. Mark Wahlberg is replacing Shia LaBeouf. That’s right, Wahlberg and the Transformers franchise are joining forces to create yet another movie with Michael Bay at its helms. This should be fun.

Bay confirmed yesterday that Wahlberg is set to star in Transformers 4. Between the first three movies and the threat of Entourage on the big screen, haven’t these two done enough to us?

E! Online news reported:

“It looks like Mark Wahlberg made quite the impression on Michael Bay while working together on Pain and Gain, because the director has now announced that he’s cast the actor in Transformers 4. ‘Mark is awesome. We had a blast working on Pain and Gain and I’m so fired up to be back working with him. An actor of his caliber is the perfect guy to re-invigorate the franchise and carry on the Transformers’ legacy,’ Bay said.”

Legacy? It’s a movie about robots in disguise. It says so in the catchphrase. Even Shia LaBeouf knew Bay didn’t “roll out” anything terribly special. In an interview with the Hollywood Reporter, Shia said he’s done with big budget movies that are full of explosions and loud noises but not much else. And, in essence, he called Michael Bay a hack:

There’s no room for being a visionary in the studio system. It literally cannot exist. You give Terrence Malick a movie like Transformers, and he’s f-cked. There’s no way for him to exist in that world.”

To be fair, you can’t compare Michael Bay, who admittedly does make a decent popcorn-muncher, to someone like Tree of Life director Terrance Malick. It’s like comparing apples to a really fancy fruit that no one’s ever heard of.

Although the third Transformers movie, Dark of the Moon, was the second highest-grossing film of 2011, it got terrible reviews. And these were from people who went into the movie knowing it was gonna be about car aliens.

Shia LaBeouf in Transformers

As the folks as Rotten Tomatoes put it:

“Its special effects — and 3D shots — are undeniably impressive, but they aren’t enough to fill up its loud, bloated running time, or mask its thin, indifferent script.”

Speaking of indifferent scripts, back in September, Wahlberg warned that Entourage could start shooting as early as Spring 2013.

“[The movie is] going to get back to the basics, kind of like the beginning of the series,? Wahlberg told Hollyscoop. ?We had very strong female characters, but we want the guys to get back to just being guys. …I think they were all weighed down by these strong women towards the end of the series, so we are going to get them going crazy everyone wants to see them get nuts again.”

Again, as bad as a Wahlberg/Bay collaboration may sound, they’re both pretty good at putting eye candy on screen. I’m guessing that Transformers 4 will be as superficial as the first few, but aside from Megan Fox’s body and stuff blowing up, you really can’t expect much more.